Skip to content

Biting the hand that feeds IT

The Register ®

Odds and Sods:


Related Whitepapers

Comments on ‘Warner Bros to remake Enter the Dragon

Form these words into a sentence: Lee/Bruce/grave/spinning

Published Friday 17th August 2007 12:25 GMT

« Back to article page

NOOOOOOOOOOO!!! 

By Dr. Mouse
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 12:46 GMT

How can they do this?!?! It is WRONG!! Even worse than remaking The Italian Job!!! Or a remix or cover of any Queen song.

Some things should not be messed with. Queen songs and Bruce Lee films are Definately near, if not at, the top of that list.

No - No way - not ever 

By David Aston
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 12:49 GMT

How can you possibly remake such a classic?

Oh well, the search for fresh Hollywood ideas carries on...

first Escape from New York 

By Thaddeus Aid
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 12:54 GMT

now Enter the Dragon

Is nothing sacred anymore?

Oh. My. Goddess. 

By Captain Jamie
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 12:55 GMT

Words fail me.

sentence 

By Gav
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 13:00 GMT

"Form these words into a sentence: Lee/Bruce/grave/spinning"

Lee grave spinning Bruce?

Grave Bruce spinning Lee?

Spinning grave Bruce Lee?

Bruce Lee grave spinning?

Am I missing something, or maybe missing words? Ahhhhh, here they are!

is/in/his/nothing/do/IT/has/to/with

Well ... 

By Wade Burchette
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 13:00 GMT

With all the other sorry movies coming out, clearly Hollywood is running out of ideas. But, in their twisted mind, ticket and DVD sales are down, not because they are putting out junk nobody wants to see, but because of piracy. So off they go continuing to blame something else for their problems, which means they won't try to produce better movies. And when a movie is really bad, they just re-release it as an extended cut and throw in more sex and violence, like that will make up for lack of a plot or story or anything good.

I recently saw some coming attractions, and everyone sucked. It is very bad when Mr. Bean looks like the best movie this autumn and winter.

Fist of Legend (1994) 

By Anonymous Coward
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 13:01 GMT

I thought "Fist of Legend" (1994) with Jet Li was worth seeing despite being a remake of Bruce Lee's "Fist of Fury" (1972).

I don't think remaking Bruce Lee is so much the problem as Hollywood remaking anything.

DNA Makes This Possible 

By Anonymous Coward
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 13:05 GMT

Easy-peasy. Dig up Brucie, swipe a bit of DNA. Hand over to Dolly the Sheep's crew. Job's a good 'un.

I understand they were going to use that technique on Hanratty. Just as well they didn't, the poor clone would've had to spend the rest of his natural doing someone else's time.

Fuck right off. 

By Darren Gallagher
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 13:15 GMT

That's all I have to say.

bloody sacrilidge!!! 

By jai
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 13:24 GMT

i can't beleive they have to front to try and remake such an iconic and classic movie as this. it's going to get slated, no matter how good it might be, because it won't be as good as everyone thinks they remember the original being. were no lessons learnt from the Itallian Job and Precinct 13 and all the others. modern film techniques and special effects are no match for the nostalgia that people feel for these classics.

@Gav - well _obviously_ surely every IT geek has seen and is a fan of Enter the Dragon, no?

RE: Fuck right off. 

By Law
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 13:24 GMT

Seconded... hollyword scum buckets!

Different title, and different plot. 

By Anonymous Coward
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 13:25 GMT

How is that a remake?

Will the last original idea please turn out the lights... 

By Peter Darby
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 13:34 GMT

... before leaving Holly- HEY! I CAN'T SEE ANYTHING!

If only....... 

By Antony
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 13:38 GMT

someone where to invent some device that allowed you to watch old plays then people would not have to keep performing them.

They could call it magic pictures, and have imps paint pictures on glass really really quickly then hold them up in front of fire in quick succession projecting the illusion of movement onto a big screen whilst reading a script....

What the...? 

By Andrew Kay
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 13:40 GMT

Disgusting. As if it wasn't bad enough making second rate sequels to "The Crow" instead of leaving it as a memorial to Brandon, this is just taking the piss.

NO HOLLYWOOD, NO!

Just re-release the original... 

By Yousef Syed
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 14:01 GMT

Given that I and numerous others were babies or young children when many of these classics were originally released, I'd love to see them in all their glory on the big screen - not some third-rate remake not worth the celluloid it's been filmed on.

... And they'd better not be released in some crummy art-house cinema, either...

If the idiots in Hollywood can't come up with anything original or anything interesting, the least they can do is avoid destroying classics, or franchising them to death.

This Summer has got to be the worst for sequels and Multi-million dollar toy adverts. Aside from Bourne Ultimatum, I can't think of much else worth the extortionate Cinema entry fee... I'm surprised people bother paying money for most of the crap and don't just get a Pirate copy... Ooops... they do, don't they... :-)

Can someone please... 

By Rob
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 14:16 GMT

...send the whole of Hollywood to The Naughty Corner until it behaves itself please.

Oh dear... 

By Peter Labrow
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 14:20 GMT

The Wicker Man, Escape from New York, Planet of the Apes - how many millions do they have to spend before they finally learn?

Awaken the Dragon??? 

By TS
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 15:03 GMT

What, are they bringing Bruce back from the dead?

There is only one Dragon, and he's gone. Remake the movie, I don't care, just call it something else. Get some new jeet kune do expert, find out his nickname and call it "Enter the {nickname}".

Little Dragon is gone, let him go...

Lest we forget... 

By Tim Porter
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 15:18 GMT

Hollywood has _never_ been about creativity - profit has always been the principle force that drives a studio.

Worth remembering though that there have been successful remakes as well, including:

John Huston's version of The Maltest Falcon (the third film version), John Carpenter's The Thing, Hitchcock's second version of his own The Man Who Knew Too Much, Ian McKellen's Richard III, De Palma's Scarface, Cronenberg's The Fly, Scorsese's Cape Fear, the Dawn of the Dead remake, The Magnificent Seven (remake of the Seven Samurai), A Fistful of Dollars (remake of Yojimbo ).

Although it's not a straight remake, I'll bring up Reservoir Dogs as it ripped off the by far more superior City On Fire wholesale.

Now taking bets on... 

By g e
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 15:20 GMT

How long they wait till they 'remake' Forbidden Planet and murder it like they did with Lost In Space and all the other abovementioned classics.

Not so many years ago all the planets were in alignment in a straight line across the solar system (at least I was give to believe such). Even the mighty English (en-GB) language has no words to describe my disappointment at the combined gravity thingies not causing California to fall into the ocean and wipe out Hollywood.

Maybe Luc Besson should remake Apocalypse Now in Romania with a Tibetan cast just to spite these movie monkeys.

Oh dear Pt2 

By Phil Brown
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 15:27 GMT

The Italian Job, Get Carter, Rollerball, Psycho and we've got the new version of The Birds to look forward to.

Damm their eyes!!!

Hollywood rule book 

By Anonymous Coward
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 15:44 GMT

page 1 rule one, ripe off some Japanese film

page 1 rule two, if japanese film unavailable or already ripped off, remake old film.

Aint broke don't fix it 

By Giles Jones
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 16:24 GMT

I have no problem with a decent director and writer remaking films, but it's always these young sell outs who do the remakes. Young directors who let the film company bosses manipulate their work.

If a director is to be able to contribute something and make a better film then they should do it.

To be honest this is as much about selling new DVDs with modern image quality and DTS sound as it is about entertaining people.

What next? Bladerunner?

Nooooo 

By Stu Reeves
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 16:33 GMT

Next you'll be telling me they will be remaking Taxi, Nikita and other such foreign films and turning them in lame, bland US versions...

What they have? Noooooooooooo.......

yay.... 

By Joel
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 16:44 GMT

See title.

What's next... 

By Edward Fingleton
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 17:07 GMT

What's next a remake of 2001: A Space Odyssey! Seriously has no-one an original idea any more.

Oh Gav, you can take your "/nothing/do/IT/has/to/with" and shove it where you normally put your "Black Mamba" eco-friendly pleasure accessory. See the breadcrumb trail includes OH MY GOD "Odds and Sods" which you and your kind might want to take as a sign for "Do not enter if you have spent too long in a server room on your own posting derogatory comments about Paris Hilton and secretly w*nking over her pictures"

RE: Now taking bets on... 

By Michael Sheils
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 17:09 GMT

"Maybe Luc Besson should remake Apocalypse Now in Romania with a Tibetan cast just to spite these movie monkeys."

I would LOVE to see that movie!

Hollywood is run by morons 

By Anonymous Coward
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 17:23 GMT

I can't for the life of me understand why they just don't simply re-release the original. The movie was made in 73, I was very young, re-release the orginal so a new generation can view it on the big screen.

m

Yes! 

By A. Merkin
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 17:33 GMT

"Enter the Dragon" would have been *so* much better if Bruce was able to take advantage stunt-wires! I can't wait to see the gravity-defying twenty-kicks attack and Dr. Craw's fully CGI rendered fighting claw!

It would also be super-awesome if they had some wise-cracking side kick for comic relief. Rendering in "Butters" from SouthPark in Post-Production would be perfect! (Assuming they can't get the rights to JarJar from Lucasfilms...)

A grand finally fight using giant mecha suits and a prolonged chase scene with multiple cars\planes\boats\dirigibles would provide good toy revenue and McDonands giveaways.

And for a twist, the gender of the dragon could be changed... I see Rosie O'Donnel in the leading role...

oh well 

By Karim Bourouba
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 18:06 GMT

should be ok i think.

so what if it is a remake? i wasnt born when the orginial was released (but I have it on DVD).

would have preferred them to do game of death instead.

Unoriginality on the cards... 

By Tim Butterworth
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 19:02 GMT

Upcoming remakes... Halloween, The Evil Dead, Logan's Run, The 39 Steps, Hellraiser, The Fly, Piranha, The Driller Killer, Footloose, The Man Who Fell to Earth, The Incredible Shrinking Man, Sleuth, Bachelor Party, Porkie's, Carousel and Death Race 2000.

For the TV fans... A-Team, Knight Rider, The Smurfs, I Dream of Jeannie, Magnum PI, Thundercats, He-Man (yes, another one), 24, The Jetsons, CHiPS, The X-Files, Dallas, Upstairs Downstairs.

More sequels to... Saw, Alien vs Predator, Shrek, Spider Man, Toy Story, Batman, Hellboy, Sin City, The Italian Job, Terminator, Ghost Rider, Beverly Hills Cop, Superman, Cabin Fever, Pink Panther, Meet The Fockers, The Grudge, Harold and Khumar, Jurassic Park, Constantine, Scary Movie, The Ring (US version), The Mummy, Silent Hill, Rambo, Indiana Jones, National Treasure, Resident Evil and Ghostbusters.

Computer games to movies... Splinter Cell, Mortal Combat, Halo, Tekken, Driver, Max Payne, Hitman, Fear Effect, Prince of Persia, Spy Hunter and Broken Sword.

A few as soon to be filmed comic characters... Justice league of America, Wolverine, Astro Boy, Razor, Mandrake, Nick Fury, The Flash, Sub-mariner, The Silver Surfer, Captain America and Watchmen.

Some of these will probably not happen, but most will and I'm sure more will appear soon!

Now, whilst I expect many of these will be rubbish, I should point out that many, many truly great Hollywood movies were once books, plays, comics, short stories or are based on real events and real people's lives. The problem at the moment isn't the lack of originality - it's the lack of talent and creative integrity.

Wheres the sense in this? 

By Dan
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 19:20 GMT

Do they expect it to gross highly at all?

Seems like a dumb idea to me and they must believe it'll make em money or they'd realise they are being dicks.

cheez 

By Anonymous Coward
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 19:58 GMT

These people should be taken outside and shot with a ball of their own shit!!!!

Efros

unanimous 

By Chris Goodchild
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 22:12 GMT

I applaud you all, every comment against a remake, which could never come close to equalling the first with or without CGI, stunt wires etc, technology will never be able to duplicate the charisma of Bruce Lee or any other star in great first time around movies.

why why why? 

By Alan Donaly
Posted Friday 17th August 2007 23:12 GMT

How could they be so stupid and still remember to breath

no you can't do this everyone who has seen the original

knows this isn't to be remade rerelease it that would be great

but remake it oh hell no.

Bowi 

By Ashley Pomeroy
Posted Saturday 18th August 2007 03:39 GMT

"Upcoming remakes... The Man Who Fell to Earth"

The mind boggles. What is there to remake? Strip away the visual style, the editing, and David Bowie, and there's nothing left.

I wonder when they will remake Aliens. Escape from New York is on the cusp of being modern; it can't be long before they remake The Terminator, or Fright Night, or Hell Comes to Frogtown, or those other 80s classics that we know and love. Innerspace. Short Circuit. Police Academy II. Explorers. Flight of the Navigator. Pee-Wee's Big Adventure. Batman.

Fletch. They will remake Fletch, with Jude Law. They will remake Romancing the Stone. And Gremlins. Fast Times at Ridgemont High. My Dinner with Andre. Enemy Mine. Angel Heart. Presumed Innocent.

And Star Wars. Eventually there will be a complete ground-up remake of Star Wars (yes, that's what it's called; it's called Star Wars, AND NOTHING ELSE).

Police Academy 

By Anonymous Coward
Posted Saturday 18th August 2007 09:08 GMT

@Ashley Pomeroy

I think you might be onto something with the Police Academy remake-thing, it was so appalling the first time around, it'll be pretty nigh on impossible to make a bigger hash of it surely?

I also envisage them digging up Timmy Mallet & Gordon the Gopher for leading roles. Oh my mistake, that'd be the British film lot, when they spawn their next mockney gangsta laugh-a-minute (calling Mr Ritchie).

I of course expect to be fully credited for the casting decisions made above.

Comedy 

By Rob Ashton
Posted Saturday 18th August 2007 14:53 GMT

They should re-make it as a comedy, and use Jackie Chan as the FBI agent, acompanied by Chris Tucker as a dumb American cop.

I'd watch that.

Fletch re-lives 

By Tim Butterworth
Posted Saturday 18th August 2007 16:56 GMT

They ARE re-making Fletch... apparently with either Zack Braff from Scrubs or Joshua Jackson from Dawson's Creek. Sorry, it fell off the end of my list.

FRO, or maybe not... 

By Fraser
Posted Sunday 19th August 2007 20:43 GMT

My initial thought was that hollywood can F.R.O, but maybe we could be onto some sort of free/green power thingum. Just mount Bruce onto an axle of some sort and hook it up to a genny. Bruce spinning in his grave would supply a whole lodda leccy.

re: Now taking bets on... 

By Anonymous Coward
Posted Monday 20th August 2007 08:55 GMT

"How long they wait till they 'remake' Forbidden Planet and murder it like they did with Lost In Space and all the other abovementioned classics."

You do realise that's a remake of The Tempest?

Just to make it "cooler"..... 

By Ishkandar
Posted Monday 20th August 2007 09:55 GMT

...they could throw in a bunch of Minis and a "really cool" guy commanding a Sherman tank....

What was that ? 

By Pascal Monett
Posted Monday 20th August 2007 11:11 GMT

"it'll be pretty nigh on impossible to make a bigger hash of it surely"

Ah, the naiveté of youth. As far as I'm concerned, there is nothing that Hollywood cannot trash more thoroughly, including its own worst flops. After all, it's the trying that counts !

Sometimes they get it wrong and make a pure gem of beauty, but those mistakes are quickly corrected.

lets remake star wars or jaws ehh!!!! 

By james billings
Posted Tuesday 21st August 2007 13:17 GMT

wot the gads mee heads just done one!!! they gotta be fuckin I MEAN FUCKIN KIDDIN!!! please protest as as much as global warmin ,whale killin,and gettin troops out of everywhere now!! GO DO IT NOW!!!!!! in the name of lee!!!!!!! AND A GAZILLION PEEPS YOU KNOW CANT BE WRONG!!!

Bruce Lee was great , but.... 

By the Jim bloke
Posted Thursday 23rd August 2007 09:19 GMT

there werent enough other actors with skills to support him.

Thats why Fists of Legend with Jet Li is better than Fists of Fury.

The Hong Kong chop-sockies have progressed a lot, and it would be interesting to see how they would do the job. In fact they may have done it better back then anyway. Bruce Lee was special in America, but he would have been one of the crowd over there.

Hollywood, will just fuck it up, of course.

whitepaper title

Solution Brief: Reduce Energy Costs

Energy consumption has become a big issue. Dramatically increase server utilization and significantly reduce energy costs through Virtualization..
whitepaper title

Server Consolidation and Containment

This paper discusses how consolidation and containment solutions with a virtual infrastructure meet the challenges of server sprawl and underutilization..

Top 20 storiesAll The Week’s HeadlinesArchiveSearch