Feeds

Vote now for the ultimate 'nom de sex'

100 contenders vie for porn immortality

  • alert
  • submit to reddit

Remote control for virtualized desktops

Reader poll Well, our recent invitation to you, our beloved readers, to submit a "nom de sex" - based on the name of your first pet and the first street you lived on - provoked a huge and highly entertaining response.

In fact, so great was the feedback that our poll to select the overall winner offers no less than 100 potential pornstar monikers; 50 for him and 50 for her.

Before cutting to the money shot, however, we'd like to make a few comments. First up, we understand that the street name part of the submission tended to make things a bit tricky for those of you who once lived on 10th Avenue or 14th Street and so forth.

Well, this also applied in some cases outside the US, as "Fido North Circular" proves. Sadly, Fido didn't make the final cut.

Other entries which didn't make the grade included "spitroast milf", "Ben Dover" and "Drew Peacock". We were also disinclined to believe that one wag ever had a hamster called "fuck off" while living on "you wankers" street, although it's good to see El Reg continues to attract the kind of reader whose sparkling wit is an inspiration to us all.

So, without further ado, let's get down to it. Below are the full listings, and you can vote for one name for each sex. The culprit's real identity, where submitted, is in brackets:

For him:

Tiger Bayernstrasse
Atlas Baystreet
Grunt Buchanan
Herman Burnham
Sacha Bushburn (Stewart Knight)
Pokey Canyon
Fudge Carlton
Tarzan Crowborough
Corky Cucamonga
Tarzan Cummer
Buster First
Zipper Forth
Felix Furlong
Thumper Hailhead
Clinton Hammer
Goliath Hartford
Jet de Havelland
Freckles Heffner (Rod Shoaf)
Bones Hibernia (Ian Callow)
Rusty Hornbeam
Rambo Gayhurst
Hairy Inglewood
Hercules Johnson
Snorkels Keachatee (Mark A)
Jigger Long
Diesel Mango (Charles)
Tugger McDougall (Jerome Brunet)
Thumper Medway
Rusty Mojave (Thomas Hinton)
Chips Morewood (Jamie P)
Torpedo Morrison
Puffy Mount Pleasant (Colin)
Miggles Mungavin
Magnum Nerano (Gar)
Napoleon Oakmount
Bully O'Toole
Nibbler Oving (Dave G)
Pluto Pembina
Flash Penryn (Chris Williams)
Rocky Pickstock (Stevie b)
Titan Sanchez (Miguel)
Raffles Saratoga
Puffer South (Kaz Rudys)
Ferrari Tackleway (Alex Wood)
Scruffy Torino
Zeus Volker
Buckwheat Washington (GM)
Spanner Westridge (Will S)
Bang Whipstreet
Hardy Woodman

For her:

Spooky Backwater
Midnight Balsam
Brandy Bickerstaff
Happy Bonaccord
Fluffy Bristol
Brighteyes Brookclose
Buffy Brookwood
Blaze Bursting
Amber Bushey (Andrew Sims)
Pussywillow Catalpa
Tinkerbell Cockle
Ferda Fucik
Pudding Greenhills
Bubble Hampton
Pusspuss Homewood
Dublin Honeysuckle
Frisky Kaystreet
Cinnamon Kildare
Alchemy Kingstreet
Coconut Kirkwall (Lana Stevens)
Shandy Maden
Chocolate Mandarin (Luke)
Vixen Meadowbrook
Misty Meadows
Freckles Morningwood
Muffy Mount
Geisha Nispero (Fabio)
Tara Novara
Tricksy O'Connor
Dusty Orchid (Shaun Vizer)
Pinky Philpott
Puss Pittwater
Brandy Pump (Naz)
Frilly Ravenshurst
Muffin Rutland
Nineve Shadygrove
Tiggy Silkmore (Andrew)
Snowy St Ives (Matt Wilkes)
Fluffy St Margarets (Tim Smith)
Sheba St Stephens
Silky Staines
Woofy Teetsville
Furry Twelveknights
Sunshine Valley
Velux Verdun (Timo)
Shandy Weld
Wiggly Wey
Malteaser Windholme
Pussy Wolf
Fluffy Woodstock (Ian Cadogan)

Security for virtualized datacentres

More from The Register

next story
MEN: For pity's sake SLEEP with LOTS of WOMEN - and avoid Prostate Cancer
And, um, don't sleep with other men. If that's what worries you
Jim Beam me up, Scotty! WHISKY from SPAAACE returns to Earth
They're insured for $1m, before you thirsty folks make plans
Now: The REAL APPLE NEWS you need to know
OMG! Gravity's totes amazeballs. Calm down, George Clooney, not your film
Boffins who stare at goats: I do believe they’re SHRINKING
Alpine chamois being squashed by global warming
Let's make an app that POSTS your POO to APPLE HQ
Plus: It's OPEN WARFARE in the Linux greybeard world
FedEx helps deliver THOUSANDS of spam messages DIRECT to its Blighty customers
Don't worry Wilson, I'll do all the paddling. You just hang on
Adorkable overshare of words like photobomb in this year's dictionaries
And hipsters are finally defined as self-loathing. Sort of
Not a loyal follower of @BritishMonarchy? You missed The QUEEN*'s first Tweet
Her Maj opens 'Information Age' at the Science Museum
prev story

Whitepapers

Why cloud backup?
Combining the latest advancements in disk-based backup with secure, integrated, cloud technologies offer organizations fast and assured recovery of their critical enterprise data.
Forging a new future with identity relationship management
Learn about ForgeRock's next generation IRM platform and how it is designed to empower CEOS's and enterprises to engage with consumers.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?
New hybrid storage solutions
Tackling data challenges through emerging hybrid storage solutions that enable optimum database performance whilst managing costs and increasingly large data stores.
Getting ahead of the compliance curve
Learn about new services that make it easy to discover and manage certificates across the enterprise and how to get ahead of the compliance curve.