Feeds

Sex game bloke traps modesty in padlock

Cue firemen bearing hydraulic cutters

Build a business case: developing custom apps

A Kent man who got his manhood trapped in a padlock "after a sex game went wrong" had to be cut free by firemen, The Sun reports.

The unnamed victim, in his 50s, intially presented the coupling of padlock and pecker at his local fire station. They packed him off to hospital, but since docs "could do nothing", he was forced to return to seek expert help. Firemen eventually released the chap's wedding tackle using hydraulic cutters.

Using the key was evidently not an option, since the key hole had inexplicably been sealed with superglue. Accordingly, it took two-and-a-half hours to end his "eye-watering ordeal", during which the firemen involved in the rescue undoubtedly kept suitably professional straight faces.

A friend of the man from Margate offered: "God knows what he was up to - but he won't be trying it again in a hurry." ®

Boost IT visibility and business value

More from The Register

next story
Cops baffled by riddle of CHICKEN who crossed ROAD
'Officers were unable to determine Chicken's intent'
Yes, but what are your plans if a DRAGON attacks?
Local UK gov outs most ridiculous FoI requests...
Drunkards warned: If you can't walk in a straight line, don't shop online, you fool!
Put it away boys. Cover them up ladies. Your credit cards, we mean
Murder accused DIDN'T ask Siri 'how to hide my roommate'
US court hears of cached browser image - not actual request
Why your mum was WRONG about whiffy tattooed people
They're a future source of RENEWABLE ENERGY
Chomp that sausage: Brits just LOVE scoffing a Full Monty
Sales of traditional brekkie foods soar as hungry folk get their mitts greasy
Nuts to your poncey hipster coffees, I want a TESLA ELECTRO-CAFE
Examining the frothy disconnect in indie cafe culture
Ex-Apple man Sam Sung - for it is he - sticks namebadge on eBay
Stump up via tat bazaar, do a good thing for ill kids
Check your Clungene, Irish women warned
Have a quick shufti, you may not be pregnant after all
prev story

Whitepapers

Endpoint data privacy in the cloud is easier than you think
Innovations in encryption and storage resolve issues of data privacy and key requirements for companies to look for in a solution.
Implementing global e-invoicing with guaranteed legal certainty
Explaining the role local tax compliance plays in successful supply chain management and e-business and how leading global brands are addressing this.
Top 8 considerations to enable and simplify mobility
In this whitepaper learn how to successfully add mobile capabilities simply and cost effectively.
Solving today's distributed Big Data backup challenges
Enable IT efficiency and allow a firm to access and reuse corporate information for competitive advantage, ultimately changing business outcomes.
Reg Reader Research: SaaS based Email and Office Productivity Tools
Read this Reg reader report which provides advice and guidance for SMBs towards the use of SaaS based email and Office productivity tools.