...is that the rampaging hordes of deadly processionary caterpillars will develop a taste for squirrel flesh. Then we can use equip Weta's robotic zombie lizards with flame-throwers and get them to destroy the lepidopteran menace.

How we stop the planet being overrun by necrogeckos is still in the R and D phase down at the pub, but laser guided armadillos look promising right about now.

"police are looking into what might have motivated its kamikaze attack"

Wrong Axis power, surely. Perhaps it was planning to invade Poland?

etc. etc.

"police are looking into what might have motivated its kamikaze attack"

Perhaps someone grabbed its nuts......

How do police find out about how it got miffed? Question the poor things relatives? Ask co-workers if he had any mental problems?

I say murder out and out. The old dear wanted to extend her premises and kicked out the local inhabitants, who then kicked back against the ninja speed zimmer frame wielding expert.

Guenther Mittelbaum, you're a dead man.

Signed,

The Squirrel Liberation Militia

'Guenther Mittelbaum, you're a dead man.

Signed,

The Squirrel Liberation Militia'

Bunch of bloody splitters !

Signed

The Squirrel Liberation Front

As chairsquirrel of The Popular Front for the Liberation of Squirrels I would like to take this opportunity to warn Herr Mittelbaum that we shall be avenging the death of our brother Brian. As soon as we've dealt with the SLF and the SLM that is....

"German Squirrel goes nuts"