Feeds

Man claims to have made love to over 30 cars

Website shows how to really pop the trunk

The Power of One eBook: Top reasons to choose HP BladeSystem

A British man has confessed to making love to over 30 different cars and setting up a website to explain his techniques to the masses.

It was British tabloid The Sun which today lifted the bonnet on people who love cars – a little too much.

It quoted the story of Chris, apparently a 38 year old from the West Country, who claims to have made the beast with two boots with everything from a Peugeot 205 to his current squeeze, a Jag XK8. Donald is not afraid of exploring the boundaries of his sexuality. He’s also had brief flings with two motorboats and a jetski.

Donald tells the paper that a nice car was a “feast for the sense…smells, feelings, and tastes.”

Not only does he like a bit of quick fit action, he also runs a website devoted to his auto erotic pastime, and claims to be in touch with about 500 other crankshaft fanatics.

Chris’s site appears to be here. We hope he’s got extra bandwidth lined up, as no doubt it will soon be overloaded with other vehicle lovers hoping to stage the ultimate car key party.

A quick cruise of the web uncovers extensive evidence of this major contributor to global warming. Here on YouTube a woman pleasures an automobile, while here fans discuss strategies to ease the pain of tailpipe action.

Being asked if you want a good hand wax and polish will never be the same.®

Reducing security risks from open source software

More from The Register

next story
Motorist 'thought car had caught fire' as Adele track came on stereo
'FIRE' caption on dashboard prompts dunderheaded hard shoulder halt
Delaware pair nabbed for getting saucy atop Mexican eatery
Burrito meets soft taco in alleged rooftop romp outrage
Japanese artist cuffed for disseminating 3D ladyparts files
Printable genitalia fall foul of 'obscene material' laws
Carlos: Slim your working week to just three days of toil
'Midas World' vision suggests you retire later, watch more tellie and buy more stuff
Brit Rockall adventurer poised to quit islet
Occupation records broken, champagne corks popped
Accused! Yahoo! exec! SUES! her! accuser!, says! sex! harassment! never! happened!
Allegations were for 'financial gain', countersuit claims
Yahoo! Japan! launches! service! for! the! dead!
If you're reading this email, I am no longer alive
Plucky Rockall podule man back on (proper) dry land
Bold, barmy Brit adventurer Nick Hancock escapes North Atlantic islet
prev story

Whitepapers

Designing a Defense for Mobile Applications
Learn about the various considerations for defending mobile applications - from the application architecture itself to the myriad testing technologies.
How modern custom applications can spur business growth
Learn how to create, deploy and manage custom applications without consuming or expanding the need for scarce, expensive IT resources.
Reducing security risks from open source software
Follow a few strategies and your organization can gain the full benefits of open source and the cloud without compromising the security of your applications.
Boost IT visibility and business value
How building a great service catalog relieves pressure points and demonstrates the value of IT service management.
Consolidation: the foundation for IT and business transformation
In this whitepaper learn how effective consolidation of IT and business resources can enable multiple, meaningful business benefits.