Feeds

Middle England battles Strategy Boutiques

Mother tongue menaced by 'product-set deep dives'

Combat fraud and increase customer satisfaction

Readers of the Daily Telegraph have got themselves into a bit of a tizz over alleged abuses our our beloved English language.

Since one correspondent wrote in to express his dismay at some linguistic outrage or other, Middle England has been falling over itself to decry the erosion of decent standards.

Among the examples to be found here, we have "gobsmacked", "train station" (instead of railway station) and "I'm good" (in reply to how are you?).

Shocking. One submission, though, struck a chord down here at Vulture Central. Take it away, Nick E:

The company for which I work has just been acquired by an American company.

Following the takeover, we have had to "align around the sales community". We "reach out" to other "communities", for example the "marketing community". The response to "How are you" is "I'm doin' good". Anything to be discussed after a meeting is "taking it offline". I'm not sure what "carving out" means, although we are all "on the same page" following the "product-set deep dives". Customers will be delighted to know that "going forward, we'll be solutionising our sweet spot".

Ah yes, it's that word "solution" again, as recently savaged by you, our beloved readers. Regarding the magnificent "product-set deep dives" and "taking it offline", both present fresh evidence that the Strategy Boutique menace still threatens western civilisation. Stay vigilant. ®

Bootnote

In response to the reader who wrote in earlier this week to complain about my use of the word "decimate" (see here), to mean "completely destroy" as opposed to the original sense of "kill one tenth" (punishment for errant Roman legions), I'd like to point out that the Spanish* word for horse (caballo) comes from the Latin "caballus" (= packhorse or mule).

I for one am not going to write to the Spanish press demanding an immediate reinstatement of the term "equus", which as any self-respecting English-speaking playwright knows, is the historically correct word.

*And the French, and the Italian, etc etc.

Top three mobile application threats

More from The Register

next story
Och aye! It's the Loch Ness Monster – but only Apple fanbois can see it
Fondleslab-friendly beastie's wake spotted... OR WAS IT?
Japanese boffin EYES up big bucks with strap-on digi-glasses
AgencyGlass saddles user with creepy OLED display
Sleuths find nosy NORKS drones on the Chinternet
UAVs likely to have been made in the Middle Kingdom
Spanish village called 'Kill the Jews' mulls rebranding exercise
Not exactly attractive to the Israeli tourist demographic
Dorian Nakamoto gets $23,000 payout over Bitcoin invention saga
Maintains he didn't create cryptocurrency, but will join community
Pirate Bay's 10 millionth upload: Colour us shocked, a SMUT FLICK
P2P badboys show online piracy is alive and humping
Teen girl arrested with 70-year-old man's four inch weapon inside her
Charged with introducing .22 snubbie to penile facility. It wasn't firing blanks
Oz bank in comedy Heartbleed blog FAIL
Bank: 'We are now safely patched.' Customers: 'You were using OpenSSL?'
Forget the beach 'n' boardwalk, check out the Santa Cruz STEVE JOBS FOUNTAIN
Reg reader snaps shot of touching tribute to Apple icon
prev story

Whitepapers

Mobile application security study
Download this report to see the alarming realities regarding the sheer number of applications vulnerable to attack, as well as the most common and easily addressable vulnerability errors.
3 Big data security analytics techniques
Applying these Big Data security analytics techniques can help you make your business safer by detecting attacks early, before significant damage is done.
The benefits of software based PBX
Why you should break free from your proprietary PBX and how to leverage your existing server hardware.
Securing web applications made simple and scalable
In this whitepaper learn how automated security testing can provide a simple and scalable way to protect your web applications.
Combat fraud and increase customer satisfaction
Based on their experience using HP ArcSight Enterprise Security Manager for IT security operations, Finansbank moved to HP ArcSight ESM for fraud management.