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Slow take-up of new network technology in the United States threatens its national security, or so IP networking firms would have us believe.

The feartastic claim, from the "combined talents" of Juniper Networks and SynExi, and is given some wake-up-and-smell-the-coffee PR backing by a survey of US government execs in which 86 per cent said the headstart on IPv6 adoption gained by Asia and Europe would have a "negative impact" on the US.

The second biggest impact of a shortage of IP addresses would be on national security, just behind its impact on "technological leadership". Of the 1,000 surveyed, 62 per cent were convinced more digits in IP addresses will help Uncle Sam dodge Jihadist tyranny.

We're concerned a fulsome exposition the minutiae of IPv6 might make us have a stroke, so we'll politely direct you to "What the hell is...IPv6".

That piece is from way back in 2000, so we'd like to advance a new cast-iron thesis regarding the War on Terror: it's all about sluggish adoption of 128-bit address spaces by American local government. Shockingly, some 53 per cent of respondents to the survey, which included IT industry buyers, thought the Federal government should provide financial assistance to them for the transition to IPv6. Perhaps by diverting funds from the National Guard?

In other news, a survey of Register journalists revealed unanimous support for government subsidies for the transition from traditional ballpoint Bic pens to smooth-glide gel-based ink. ®

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