Feeds

Council contains killer pear tree menace

Kids protected from 1lb fruit attack

Top 5 reasons to deploy VMware with Tegile

Worcester council has moved with lightning speed to protect citizens from killer pear trees, The Sun reports.

Officials cordoned off the pair of 30-ft arboreal assassins - which have stood in Cripplegate Park for 50 years - after "receiving a complaint the trees are a health hazard".

The trees bear the black pear which is the symbol of Worcestershire. The fruit can reach 1lb, and to ensure that nobody is in any doubt as to their potentially fatal weight, the council also attached sign to the tress reading "Warning, pears falling!".

Local reaction was predictable. Barry Cox, 40, told The Sun: "This is a crazy waste of time and money. It seems people aren't credited with common sense any more. Next thing they will be issuing people with hard hats before they enter the park."

Helen Crump, 32, weighed in with: "It's the nanny state. The world has gone mad. I've never heard of anyone killed by a falling pear."

However, the council's parks and cemeteries manager Ian Yates defended: "If we felled the trees or closed the park, I'd understand the resentment - but this is an adequate response. There are some sizeable pears and not everyone is going to be passing thinking a pear might fall on them, especially children. These signs divert people away from the danger."

It's not just kids' welfare which is keeping the council awake at night, though. Explaining the very real danger of pear-flavoured litigation, Yates added: "This is a lot cheaper than having a no-win, no-fee solicitor taking us to court." ®

Top 5 reasons to deploy VMware with Tegile

More from The Register

next story
MI6 oversight report on Lee Rigby murder: US web giants offer 'safe haven for TERRORISM'
PM urged to 'prioritise issue' after Facebook hindsight find
I'll be back (and forward): Hollywood's time travel tribulations
Quick, call the Time Cops to sort out this paradox!
Assange™ slumps back on Ecuador's sofa after detention appeal binned
Swedish court rules there's 'great risk' WikiLeaker will dodge prosecution
NSA mass spying reform KILLED by US Senators
Democrats needed just TWO more votes to keep alive bill reining in some surveillance
prev story

Whitepapers

Seattle children’s accelerates Citrix login times by 500% with cross-tier insight
Seattle Children’s is a leading research hospital with a large and growing Citrix XenDesktop deployment. See how they used ExtraHop to accelerate launch times.
How to determine if cloud backup is right for your servers
Two key factors, technical feasibility and TCO economics, that backup and IT operations managers should consider when assessing cloud backup.
Getting started with customer-focused identity management
Learn why identity is a fundamental requirement to digital growth, and how without it there is no way to identify and engage customers in a meaningful way.
Reg Reader Research: SaaS based Email and Office Productivity Tools
Read this Reg reader report which provides advice and guidance for SMBs towards the use of SaaS based email and Office productivity tools.
Managing SSL certificates with ease
The lack of operational efficiencies and compliance pitfalls associated with poor SSL certificate management, and how the right SSL certificate management tool can help.