Feeds

Robin Hood actually Welsh, says American

You've come to Caerdydd once too often, Bran ap Brychan!

Secure remote control for conventional and virtual desktops

A US historian has upset the good burghers of Nottingham by claiming Robin Hood was actually Welsh, the Evening Standard reports.

Stephen Lawhead, 59, reckons our dashing hero was really called Bran ap Brychan and led his merry men in the Marsh, "a primeval forest in Wales in the eleventh century". Bran is described as "a spoiled and selfish prince who becomes the rightful heir to the kingdom of Elfael after his father is killed by the Normans".

Sadly, said kingdom is quickly occupied by evil Norman prince Count Falkes de Braose, forcing Bran to leg it into the woods. Naturally, and since we suspect Lawhead is moonlighting as Mel Gibson's screenplay writer, Bran (Brad Pitt) soon hooks up with Angharad (Paris Hilton), a "mysterious healer and singing storyteller", whose faith in the renegade's "potential as a heroic king" gives him the bright idea to steal from the rich - including Count Falkes de Braose (Alan Rickman) - "in order to raise the money needed to buy back his kingdom and free his people, forced into slavery by their new ruler".

Lawhead said: "Several small but telling clues locate the legend of Robin Hood in Wales. Every single Welshman was ready for battle at a moment's notice. A Welsh location is also suggested by its nature and landscape.

"While the forests of England had long since become well managed business property at the time, Wales still had enormous stretches of virgin wood. It would have been exceedingly difficult for Robin to hide in England's ever dwindling Sherwood. But he could have lived for years in the forests of the March and never been seen nor heard."

After outlining his Braveheart-standard historical evidence, Lawhead admitted: "I realise, though, that we could have some trouble with Nottingham. They are pretty heavily invested in the Nottingham Robin Hood version and with good reason."

Nottingham City Council's Stephen Richeux duly responded: "We laugh at this suggestion. We imagine this author is trying to make a name for himself with the outrageous suggestion that Wales is the home of our beloved Robin Hood. He is known to have spent a lot of time in Sherwood Forest, so I don't know where Wales gets a look in."

Richeux further suggested that Lawhead was in the pay of the Welsh Tourist Board, presumably desperate for Mel Gibson's Glendwr (working title) to inject some cash into the local economy by hiring every unemployed man in Wales to bare his buttocks at the Normans. ®

Beginner's guide to SSL certificates

More from The Register

next story
Holy vintage vehicles! Earliest known official Batmobile goes on sale
Riddle me this: are you prepared to pay US$180k?
'Open source just means big companies can steal your code.' O RLY?
Plus: Flame of the Week returns, for one night only!
Bible THUMP: Good Book beats Darwin to most influential tome title
Folio Society crowns fittest of surviving volumes
Microsoft to bring back beloved 1990s super-hit BATTLETOADS!?*
* Or maybe not. It is just a trademark filing, after all
U wot? Silicon Roundabout set to become Silicon U-BEND
Crap-spouting London upstarts to get permanent road closure
Hey, you, PHONE-FACE! Kickstarter in-car mobe mount will EMBED your phone into your MUG
Stick it on the steering wheel and wait for the airbag to fire
NEWSFLASH: It's time to ditch dullard Facebook chums
Everything hot in tech, courtesy of avian anchor Regina Eggbert
Fire fighters call for no-drone zone around bushfires
UAVs can take down water-spaffing 'copters, so firies want them to butt out
prev story

Whitepapers

Why cloud backup?
Combining the latest advancements in disk-based backup with secure, integrated, cloud technologies offer organizations fast and assured recovery of their critical enterprise data.
A strategic approach to identity relationship management
ForgeRock commissioned Forrester to evaluate companies’ IAM practices and requirements when it comes to customer-facing scenarios versus employee-facing ones.
Reg Reader Research: SaaS based Email and Office Productivity Tools
Read this Reg reader report which provides advice and guidance for SMBs towards the use of SaaS based email and Office productivity tools.
Choosing a cloud hosting partner with confidence
Download Choosing a Cloud Hosting Provider with Confidence to learn more about cloud computing - the new opportunities and new security challenges.
New hybrid storage solutions
Tackling data challenges through emerging hybrid storage solutions that enable optimum database performance whilst managing costs and increasingly large data stores.