Feeds

Robin Hood actually Welsh, says American

You've come to Caerdydd once too often, Bran ap Brychan!

Top 5 reasons to deploy VMware with Tegile

A US historian has upset the good burghers of Nottingham by claiming Robin Hood was actually Welsh, the Evening Standard reports.

Stephen Lawhead, 59, reckons our dashing hero was really called Bran ap Brychan and led his merry men in the Marsh, "a primeval forest in Wales in the eleventh century". Bran is described as "a spoiled and selfish prince who becomes the rightful heir to the kingdom of Elfael after his father is killed by the Normans".

Sadly, said kingdom is quickly occupied by evil Norman prince Count Falkes de Braose, forcing Bran to leg it into the woods. Naturally, and since we suspect Lawhead is moonlighting as Mel Gibson's screenplay writer, Bran (Brad Pitt) soon hooks up with Angharad (Paris Hilton), a "mysterious healer and singing storyteller", whose faith in the renegade's "potential as a heroic king" gives him the bright idea to steal from the rich - including Count Falkes de Braose (Alan Rickman) - "in order to raise the money needed to buy back his kingdom and free his people, forced into slavery by their new ruler".

Lawhead said: "Several small but telling clues locate the legend of Robin Hood in Wales. Every single Welshman was ready for battle at a moment's notice. A Welsh location is also suggested by its nature and landscape.

"While the forests of England had long since become well managed business property at the time, Wales still had enormous stretches of virgin wood. It would have been exceedingly difficult for Robin to hide in England's ever dwindling Sherwood. But he could have lived for years in the forests of the March and never been seen nor heard."

After outlining his Braveheart-standard historical evidence, Lawhead admitted: "I realise, though, that we could have some trouble with Nottingham. They are pretty heavily invested in the Nottingham Robin Hood version and with good reason."

Nottingham City Council's Stephen Richeux duly responded: "We laugh at this suggestion. We imagine this author is trying to make a name for himself with the outrageous suggestion that Wales is the home of our beloved Robin Hood. He is known to have spent a lot of time in Sherwood Forest, so I don't know where Wales gets a look in."

Richeux further suggested that Lawhead was in the pay of the Welsh Tourist Board, presumably desperate for Mel Gibson's Glendwr (working title) to inject some cash into the local economy by hiring every unemployed man in Wales to bare his buttocks at the Normans. ®

Secure remote control for conventional and virtual desktops

More from The Register

next story
Win a year’s supply of chocolate (no tech knowledge required)
Over £200 worth of the good stuff up for grabs
Facebook's Zuckerberg in EBOLA VIRUS FIGHT: Billionaire battles bug
US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention contacted as site supremo coughs up
Space exploration is just so lame. NEW APPS are mankind's future
We feel obliged to point out the headline statement is total, utter cobblers
Red Bull does NOT give you wings, $13.5m lawsuit says so
Website letting consumers claim $10 cash back crashes after stampede
Down-under record: Australian gets $140k for pussy
'Tiffany' closes deal - 'it's more common to offer your wife', says agent
Internet finally ready to replace answering machine cassette tape
It's a simple message and I'm leaving out the whistles and bells
Swiss wildlife park serves up furry residents to visitors
'It's ecological' says spokesman, now how would you like your Bambi done?
The iPAD launch BEFORE it happened: SPECULATIVE GUFF ahead of actual event
Nerve-shattering run-up to the pre-planned known event
STONER SHEEP get the MUNCHIES after feasting on £4k worth of cannabis plants
Baaaaaa! Fanny's Farm's woolly flock is high, maaaaaan
FedEx helps deliver THOUSANDS of spam messages DIRECT to its Blighty customers
Don't worry Wilson, I'll do all the paddling. You just hang on
prev story

Whitepapers

Forging a new future with identity relationship management
Learn about ForgeRock's next generation IRM platform and how it is designed to empower CEOS's and enterprises to engage with consumers.
Why cloud backup?
Combining the latest advancements in disk-based backup with secure, integrated, cloud technologies offer organizations fast and assured recovery of their critical enterprise data.
Win a year’s supply of chocolate
There is no techie angle to this competition so we're not going to pretend there is, but everyone loves chocolate so who cares.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?
Intelligent flash storage arrays
Tegile Intelligent Storage Arrays with IntelliFlash helps IT boost storage utilization and effciency while delivering unmatched storage savings and performance.