Feeds

Suicide squirrel in opera-hating kamikaze bike spoke mangle

Finnished

Top three mobile application threats

RZSL A Helsinki squirrel dived into the bicycle wheel of passing opera singer Esa Ruuttunen, hospitalising him and killing itself.

The squirrel - apparently not an opera fan - ran headlong at Ruuttunen's spokes. Alarmed, the bicycling bass baritone hit the deck.

Instead of attending rehearsals for new Finnish opus Kaarmeen hetki (Hour of the Serpent), Ruuttunen attended casualty with concussion and a broken nose.

Fans of Scandinavian-language* "passion-laden thriller[s]" looking forward to the aforementioned "wild drama delving into the soul of a woman" needn't begin a candlelit prayer vigil for Ruuttunen's recovery though. A Finnish National Opera spokeswoman told Reuters: "He is not yet singing in rehearsals, but thinks he will be able to perform at the world premiere."

Yesterday's tragically notable exception aside, things have been fairly quiet on the animal attack front this summer. We look forward to a resumption of full hostilities forthwith. ®

Bootnote

*Within seconds of posting this story, we were deluged with complaints from the Arctic unit of El Reg's diachronic linguistics and etymology SWAT team.

Firstly, it's "Käärmeen hetki". The letter "ä" in Finnish, unlike German for example, is a totally separate letter of the alphabet. Secondly, the opera cannot be "Scandinavian-language" as Finnish isn't. It's Finno-Ugric, being related to Estonia and Hungarian, rather than the likes of Swedish and Norwegian.

- George

We consider ourselves duly educated.

3 Big data security analytics techniques

More from The Register

next story
KILLER SPONGES menacing California coastline
Surfers are safe, crustaceans less so
Opportunity selfie: Martian winds have given the spunky ol' rover a spring cleaning
Power levels up 70 per cent as the rover keeps on truckin'
Liftoff! SpaceX Falcon 9 lifts Dragon on third resupply mission to ISS
SpaceX snaps smartly into one-second launch window
LOHAN and the amazing technicolor spaceplane
Our Vulture 2 livery is wrapped, and it's les noix du mutt
KILLER ROBOTS, DNA TAMPERING and PEEPING CYBORGS: the future looks bright!
Americans optimistic about technology despite being afraid of EVERYTHING
R.I.P. LADEE: Probe smashes into lunar surface at 3,600mph
Swan dive signs off successful science mission
Discovery time for 200m WONDER MATERIALS shaved from 4 MILLENNIA... to 4 years
Alloy, Alloy: Boffins in speed-classification breakthrough
prev story

Whitepapers

Securing web applications made simple and scalable
In this whitepaper learn how automated security testing can provide a simple and scalable way to protect your web applications.
3 Big data security analytics techniques
Applying these Big Data security analytics techniques can help you make your business safer by detecting attacks early, before significant damage is done.
The benefits of software based PBX
Why you should break free from your proprietary PBX and how to leverage your existing server hardware.
Top three mobile application threats
Learn about three of the top mobile application security threats facing businesses today and recommendations on how to mitigate the risk.
Combat fraud and increase customer satisfaction
Based on their experience using HP ArcSight Enterprise Security Manager for IT security operations, Finansbank moved to HP ArcSight ESM for fraud management.