Feeds

Ten gadgets to get you sacked

Vital ammunition for the office prankster

Secure remote control for conventional and virtual desktops

Shriekingchicken_16. Shrieking chicken
It's a toss-up what will happen first if you buy this gadget - the corporate heave-ho from your boss, or the literal heave-ho-out-the-window from your colleagues. It's a 17-inch rubber chicken (and size is important in these things) that makes "the most annoying noise in the world" when you squeeze it. I can only surmise that it sounds like Bonnie Langford doing her Crazy Frog impression to a backing of Polish death metal. Maybe. £6.95 from BoysStuff.

Cubworvar_lg7. Cube World
Hmm, this is a strange idea - interactive LCD cubes with little virtual men "living" inside them - it's like the illegitimate Tamagotchi child of Apple and Ikea. They provide endless amusement with their capering about - there's over 100 animations - and can even interact with each other. So why would they lose you your job, assuming you don't have a "no self-conscious wackiness" clause in your contract? Check the review on the site from Pippa in Southsea: "My boss bought me two sets of these. Bit silly really, as I haven't done any work since." YOU'RE FIRED! £19.95 per pair from I Want One Of Those.

Windupelephant_28. Wind-up Japanese tin space elephant
It's a vintage robo-toy from Japan that's up for grabs on eBay for a mere $1,150. Trust me, buy this on your corporate credit-card then display it proudly on your desk, and you'll be out of the building faster than you can say "Paypal refund!". Bayraider has the full details.

Rawkdrumsticks9. Rock Beat drumsticks
You got rhythm. You got soul. You got a desk that's demanding to be drummed on. So drum on it with these electronic drum-sticks which allow you to live out your Phil Collins fantasies (well, not the ones involving dumping your wife by fax) from the comfort of your office chair. They can switch between snare drum, tom-tom and crash cymbal at will - by your second-run through of the drum solo from Led Zep's "Moby Dick", you'll be in the warm embrace of burly security guards. £9.95 from Firebox.

10. Super Slingshot catapult
Because if all else fails, a constant stream of high-speed foam projectiles will have your boss reaching for his firing...well, whatever implement bosses use for firing people. More adventurous readers might swap other objects for the foam balls - stones, mouldy fruit, atomic warheads... £4.95 from BoysStuff. ®

Other stories

Next gen Sky+ box first details
Barbie laptop
Robots all over eBay

New hybrid storage solutions

More from The Register

next story
Half a BILLION in the making: Bungie's Destiny reviewed
It feels very familiar - but it's still good
Apple's big bang: iPhone 6, ANOTHER iPhone 6 Plus and WATCH OUT
Let's >sigh< see what Cupertino has been up to for the past year
Huawei ditches new Windows Phone mobe plans, blames poor sales
Giganto mobe firm slams door shut on Microsoft. OH DEAR
Phones 4u website DIES as wounded mobe retailer struggles to stay above water
Founder blames 'ruthless network partners' for implosion
Get your Indian Landfill Android One handsets - they're only SIXTY QUID
Cheap and deafening mobes for the subcontinental masses
Apple's SNEAKY plan: COPY ANDROID. Hello iPhone 6, Watch
Sizes, prices and all – but not for the wrist-o-puter
DARPA-backed jetpack prototype built to make soldiers run faster
4 Minute Mile project hatched to speed up tired troops
prev story

Whitepapers

Secure remote control for conventional and virtual desktops
Balancing user privacy and privileged access, in accordance with compliance frameworks and legislation. Evaluating any potential remote control choice.
Saudi Petroleum chooses Tegile storage solution
A storage solution that addresses company growth and performance for business-critical applications of caseware archive and search along with other key operational systems.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?
Security for virtualized datacentres
Legacy security solutions are inefficient due to the architectural differences between physical and virtual environments.
Providing a secure and efficient Helpdesk
A single remote control platform for user support is be key to providing an efficient helpdesk. Retain full control over the way in which screen and keystroke data is transmitted.