Feeds

Germans gun down rampaging bear

Zero ursine tolerance in Bavaria

SANS - Survey on application security programs

State authorities in Bavaria have shot dead a brown bear which had become the country's first wild sighting since 1835.

Bruno crossed the Alpine border from Austria in May, and was at first greeted with "we have nothing to fear" complacency from wildlife agents. The 220lb bear, aiming to fatten up for its winter hibernation, predictably went on a sheep binge, leading panicked farmers into calls for a government assassination.

Only last week, the BBC reported that Bruno had staged a daring escape from a pack of specialist Finnish hunting dogs drafted in to corner him.

Unfortunately for the mutton-loving beast, the plan had been to dart and forcibly repatriate him. Instead, Bruno's would-be captors decided to allow hunters to put a bullet in him, in an act of outright Teutonic aggression which can only serve to further enrage the world's bear population.

The RZSL™ bunker, which had been restocking munitions and briefing field agents in preparation for the resumption of hostilities at the end of the World Cup, has been scrambled back up to DEFCON 3 on the news.

A top-level communiqué has been sent to all keepers of mixed bear and monkey enclosures warning special vigilance when bears are seen loitering in groups of more than two. And possibly to turn off the electric fence. ®

Top three mobile application threats

More from The Register

next story
Red-faced LOHAN team 'fesses up in blown SPEARS fuse fiasco
Standing in the corner, big pointy 'D' hats
KILLER SPONGES menacing California coastline
Surfers are safe, crustaceans less so
LOHAN's Punch and Judy show relaunches Thursday
Weather looking good for second pop at test flights
Discovery time for 200m WONDER MATERIALS shaved from 4 MILLENNIA... to 4 years
Alloy, Alloy: Boffins in speed-classification breakthrough
Curiosity finds not-very-Australian-shaped rock on Mars
File under 'messianic pastries' and move on, people
Elon Musk's LEAKY THRUSTER gas stalls Space Station supply run
Helium seeps from Falcon 9 first stage, delays new legs for NASA robonaut
Top Secret US payload launched into space successfully
Clandestine NRO spacecraft sets off on its unknown mission
New FEMTO-MOON sighted BIRTHING from Saturn's RING
Icy 'Peggy' looks to be leaving the outer rings
Melting permafrost switches to nasty, high-gear methane release
Result? 'Way more carbon being released into the atmosphere as methane'
prev story

Whitepapers

Designing a defence for mobile apps
In this whitepaper learn the various considerations for defending mobile applications; from the mobile application architecture itself to the myriad testing technologies needed to properly assess mobile applications risk.
3 Big data security analytics techniques
Applying these Big Data security analytics techniques can help you make your business safer by detecting attacks early, before significant damage is done.
Five 3D headsets to be won!
We were so impressed by the Durovis Dive headset we’ve asked the company to give some away to Reg readers.
The benefits of software based PBX
Why you should break free from your proprietary PBX and how to leverage your existing server hardware.
Securing web applications made simple and scalable
In this whitepaper learn how automated security testing can provide a simple and scalable way to protect your web applications.