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Apple, Nike partner to produce iPod pumps

Trainers that talk back

Secure remote control for conventional and virtual desktops

Apple has teamed up with wingéd Nike, the Ancient Greek personification of athletic footwear*, to offer an iPod Nano add-on that talks to your shoes.

The package also contains a separate wireless dongle that fits inside the sole of one of your high-priced trainers and beams data to the iPod, which, using text-to-speech technology, informs you of your progress through workout or jog. Suitable sneakers and the iPod Nano must, of course, be purchased separately.

Our money's on an Easter Egg tucked inside the software by crafty Apple coders that at random moments whispers: "That pain in your shoulder... it's a coronary, you know..." or "Is that the sound of your kneecap crumbling?"

The Nike+iPod package costs $29, though you can buy a cheap enough pedometer that does much the same thing for a fraction of the price. Heck, they're giving pedometers away with sugar and additive-packed breakfast cereals over here. ®

*We know...

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