Woman eBays groping slimeball's jacket

How not to pick up women in Chicago

By Lester Haines • Get more from this author

Posted in Music and Media, 4th May 2006 10:05 GMT

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Any reader who has ever tried to pick up a woman in Chicago may already be aware of the techniques which are absolutely guaranteed to result in abject failure - or worse.

For those of you yet to make a pitch to Illinois' fairer sex, these no-nos include: sliming all over your intended victim; blatantly grabbing her breasts; throwing your hot sweaty oversized weight around near her; and shaking your big fat ass in her face.

For proof, just ask the owner of this jacket:

Blimey. Here's the background:

This is the first item I have ever listed on ebay and I am doing it for one specific reason- to give the loser who slimed all over me and blatantly grabbed my breasts at the bar last Thursday an opportunity to buy his jacket back. I also thought it would be fun to sell something he left behind after annoying me for an hour- bid this jacket up, the higher it goes the more Mr. Prince Charming will have to pay to get it back!

Nice one. We reckon the outrage took place at a career fair in the Windy City, if the seller's final insult is anything to go by:

If you are reading this realizing you are the 5'9" 200 lb jack ass I met at the bar last week- call your parents. I'm sure they will buy you another jacket, afterall you don't have a job.

Yes, indeed - hell hath no fury like a woman groped, and no messing. ®

Bootnote

Thanks to Alex Morris for the tip-off.

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