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Bendy bus attacks Leeds cake shop

Killer public transport alert

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We've warned in the past of the dangers posed to humanity by the new generation of hi-tech bendy buses, but it seems that the good burghers of Leeds were not listening.

A BBC report just in says a First Group vehicle this morning assaulted "Ainsleys bakery as it turned a corner into Infirmary Street", smashing its way through the front window and sending cake-fanciers running for their lives.

Mercifully, the bus was passengerless at the time and the driver and two bakery customers were taken to Leeds General Infirmary suffering from nothing more than minor injuries.

Eyewitness Angela Jobling said: "The bus was trying to turn and as it did it just slowly hit the kerb and just went into Ainsleys. It was very loud. I was expecting it to explode but fortunately it didn't and everybody was fine."

Sounds straightforward enough, but monitors of the Rise of the Machines™ will recall that in March 2004, three fire-breathing Citaro bendy buses spontaneously combusted in London - a vehicular mini-uprising followed a year later by another Satanic bendy bus' incendiary attack.

At the time, we attributed the menace to the dark hand of London Mayor and articulated transport guru "Red" Ken Livingstone. His role in the latest outrage is uncertain. ®

Bootnote

Thanks to a vigilant Stan Ferguson-Smith for this killer bus sighting. b3ta has a pic of the assault here.

The Rise of the Machines™

Captain Cyborg acquires Dalek capability
Man survives satanic BMW crash-and-burn
Second Freeview box signals alien invasion fleet
Lizard Army fuses woman with black helicopter
NRA probes Japanese sex android
Androids launch minicab firm
Beware the breast-examining hand of death
Lizard Army Neo-Mech menaces eBay
Vampire robonurses hunt in packs
Captain Cyborg gives forth on CNN
Cornell Uni develops apocalypse cube
Sex android begats Armageddon machine
Man executes Chrysler
Rise of the man-eating cyberloo
Sobbing Frenchman recounts Renault Laguna terror ordeal
Fire-breathing bus attacks South London
Dyson unleashes self-replicating hoover
Battling teen crushes roboarm menace
French join motorised Lizard Alliance
Lizard Army develops copulating robot
We are Zogg: The Cuddly Menace
Lizard Army invades Alaska
London menaced by flaming DVD players
Killer hoover attacks Scotsman
Car self-destructs in assassination bid
The rise of the rat-brain controlled android
Japanese unveil trumpet-playing robot
Boffins unleash robotic cockroach
Ukrainian teen fights the Rise of the Machines
Man in satanic Renault terror ordeal
Killer cyberappliances: Satan implicated
US develops motorised robobollard
Killer cyberloo kidnaps kiddie
A robot in every home by 2010
Cyberappliances attack Italian village
Fire-breathing buses threaten London
Cyberloo blast rocks Stoke-on-Trent
Spanish cyberkiosks claim second victim
Cyberkiosk assaults Spanish teenager
Hi-tech toilet caught on camera
Hi-tech toilet swallows woman

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