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Rollerskating coppers defeated by turf

Think 'Daleks and stairs'...

Internet Security Threat Report 2014

A top-notch UK crimebusting initiative - which saw London's Royal Parks Constabulary issued with in-line rollerskates - has ground to a halt after crims realised they could escape simply by scarpering across grass, the Telegraph reports.

Four Royal Parks officers were issued with the pursuit shoewear six years ago after some bright spark noted the success of similar schemes in Florida, Paris and the Netherlands*.

However, Supt Derek Pollock, of London's Royal Parks operational command unit admitted: "It just didn't work. The moment people realised they were being chased they would switch to a soft surface.

"If the criminal went on to the grass, the officer giving chase had to stop, take off his skates then follow him without proper footwear while carrying his skates."

Pollock, whose officers have returned to their traditional perp-hunting bikes, further confessed: "Not an awful lot of officers were interested because it hurts when you fall over." ®

Bootnote

*It's evident that the London criminal mind is simply more highly evolved than those of Dutch, French and US miscreants. If they ever get wind of this grass idea abroad, law and order could quickly collapse, make no mistake.

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