Feeds

Paris Hilton may play movie Mother Teresa

No, really

Combat fraud and increase customer satisfaction

Here's one you can file under: "you're pulling my plonker". An Indian film director is considering Paris Hilton for the role of saintly Mother Teresa, IANS news agency suggests.

Director T Rajeevnath admitted: "My agents in California have contacted Paris Hilton." He explained that the reason behind this extending of feelers in Hilton's direction was the multi-talented heiress's refusal to get her kit off for Playboy.

Rajeevnath continued: "Although there are several actresses willing to play the role of Mother Teresa, the most widely respected and loved person, the history of the actress who is finally chosen for the role would have to be analysed thoroughly before she is chosen."

We reckon Mr Rajeevnath is going to get a nasty shock when he finally gets around to analysing Ms Hilton's "history". Regarding her acting credentials, well, she last year appeared in House of Wax, which was pretty well universally kicked to death by the critics.

Likewise, her steamy Carl's Jr. Spicy BBQ Burger TV advert cavort did little to demonstrate convincing thespian tendencies.

She did, though, give a far more convinving technical performance in One Night in Paris, albeit displaying the sort of skills which we very much doubt will be required to play Mother Teresa. As one critic put it: "In this 37-minute shagfest Hilton literally sucks. And so does her acting." ®

Top three mobile application threats

More from The Register

next story
Och aye! It's the Loch Ness Monster – but only Apple fanbois can see it
Fondleslab-friendly beastie's wake spotted... OR WAS IT?
Japanese boffin EYES up big bucks with strap-on digi-glasses
AgencyGlass saddles user with creepy OLED display
Sleuths find nosy NORKS drones on the Chinternet
UAVs likely to have been made in the Middle Kingdom
Pirate Bay's 10 millionth upload: Colour us shocked, a SMUT FLICK
P2P badboys show online piracy is alive and humping
Spanish village called 'Kill the Jews' mulls rebranding exercise
Not exactly attractive to the Israeli tourist demographic
Dorian Nakamoto gets $23,000 payout over Bitcoin invention saga
Maintains he didn't create cryptocurrency, but will join community
Teen girl arrested with 70-year-old man's four inch weapon inside her
Charged with introducing .22 snubbie to penile facility. It wasn't firing blanks
Oz bank in comedy Heartbleed blog FAIL
Bank: 'We are now safely patched.' Customers: 'You were using OpenSSL?'
prev story

Whitepapers

Securing web applications made simple and scalable
In this whitepaper learn how automated security testing can provide a simple and scalable way to protect your web applications.
3 Big data security analytics techniques
Applying these Big Data security analytics techniques can help you make your business safer by detecting attacks early, before significant damage is done.
The benefits of software based PBX
Why you should break free from your proprietary PBX and how to leverage your existing server hardware.
Mainstay ROI - Does application security pay?
In this whitepaper learn how you and your enterprise might benefit from better software security.
Combat fraud and increase customer satisfaction
Based on their experience using HP ArcSight Enterprise Security Manager for IT security operations, Finansbank moved to HP ArcSight ESM for fraud management.