Feeds

Is this the worst corporate video ever?

Donna Summer crashes headlong into media solutions outfit

Providing a secure and efficient Helpdesk

We recently noted that Queen's We are the Champions had been voted the world's most fave song of all time - ever. Reader Ciaran Dolan has just written in to express surprise, if not dismay, that Dutch "media investment management" outfit MindShare's version of the 1983 Donna Summer smash She works hard for the money did not even make it into the top ten.

The company's blurb states:

MindShare was created in 1997 and designed to be the first truly global full-service media company. We are called MindShare because of our belief in collaboration and the integration of services with our people, our clients, creative partners, research partners, media owners and all other colleagues.

We believe 'mind share' is the ultimate measure of successful communication: combining with tangible business results.

To see for yourselves just what MindShare means by "innovative media solutions", check out its truly sensational promotional video version of the aforementioned ditty right here. Suffice it to say, the song has been retitled "We work hard for your money" and contains the immortal lines:

Planning various strategies,
Buying loads of GRPs,
And it's all about...
Knowing your consumers' needs.

Every client, big or small,
Is important to us all,
Group M is the name,
Buying power is our game.

Enough. For the record, Group M appears to be the global octopus to which MindShare is ultimately connected. Now, if you'll excuse us, we are all going to the pub to drink a huge quantity of scotch and stare blankly at the wall for the next three or four hours. ®

It gets worse

Impressed by the MindShare vid? Try this, courtesy of William Morrish:

That isnt bad at all, if you want the worst EVER corporate song you need to check out the Drupa tunes

Drupa is a print and publishing conference in dusseldorf which is held every 4 years, and each year they make a classic tune

http://www.messe-duesseldorf.de/drupa/en/sp_song_2.html

Drupa '96 (Id call it Umpa Umpa with a beat) includes these lines: drupa, drupa, drupa international printing an paper fair we welcome you to dusseldorf germany to see whats new in the graphics industry

Drupa '00 (more upbeat EuroDance) Its the time, its the place its the year

These are truly awful!

Yes they are. God preserve us all.

Security for virtualized datacentres

More from The Register

next story
Are you a fat boy? Get to university NOW, you PENNILESS SLACKER
Rotund types paid nearly 20% less than people who didn't eat all the pies
Emma Watson should SHUT UP, all this abuse is HER OWN FAULT
... said an anon coward who we really wish hadn't posted on our website
Japan develops robot CHEERLEADERS which RIDE on BALLS
'Will put smiles on faces worldwide', predicts corporate PR chief
Bruges Booze tubes to pump LOVELY BEER underneath city
Belgian booze pumped from underground
Oz carrier Tiger Air takes terror alerts to new heights
Don't doodle, it might cost you your flight
Amazon: Wish in one hand, Twit in the other – see which one fills first
#AmazonWishList A year's supply of Arran scotch, ta
Let it go, Steve: Ballmer bans iPads from his LA Clippers b-ball team
Can you imagine the scene? 'Hey guys, it's your new owner – WTF is that on your desk?'
Oi, London thief. We KNOW what you're doing - our PRECRIME system warned us
Aye, shipmate, it be just like that Minority Report
prev story

Whitepapers

A strategic approach to identity relationship management
ForgeRock commissioned Forrester to evaluate companies’ IAM practices and requirements when it comes to customer-facing scenarios versus employee-facing ones.
Storage capacity and performance optimization at Mizuno USA
Mizuno USA turn to Tegile storage technology to solve both their SAN and backup issues.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?
Beginner's guide to SSL certificates
De-mystify the technology involved and give you the information you need to make the best decision when considering your online security options.
Security for virtualized datacentres
Legacy security solutions are inefficient due to the architectural differences between physical and virtual environments.