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Tinfoil hats attract mind-control signals, boffins learn

Government conspiracy suspected

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Wearing a tinfoil hat to deflect government mind-control radio waves is even more foolish than most people think. According to several (apparent) students from MIT who tested several hat designs, there was "a 30 db amplification at 2.6 Ghz and a 20 db amplification at 1.2 Ghz, regardless of the position of the antenna on the cranium."

The students note that "the helmets amplify frequency bands that coincide with those allocated to the US government between 1.2 Ghz and 1.4 Ghz. According to the FCC, These bands are supposedly reserved for 'radio location' (ie, GPS), and other communications with satellites."

The researchers speculate that the government is behind the rumour that tinfoil hats protect people from invasive radio signals in order to encourage their use and therefore to enhance the effectiveness of their radio control program.

We're no experts, but the researchers did admit to using Reynolds brand aluminum foil, rather than the classic tin foil, and we wonder if this could have skewed the results. We wonder also if a tinfoil propeller beanie might scatter the signals more effectively than a plain hat, and offer this humble suggestion for the benefit of the paranoiac community until further testing is complete. ®

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The research results

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