Feeds

No Office suite from us - Google

'See, we start with the toolbar, then we do the Talking Paperclip...'

5 things you didn’t know about cloud backup

Google co-founder Sergey Brin has quashed speculation that the giant ad broker is to introduce a web-based Office suite.

"We don't have any plans," he told Web 2.0 conference organizer John Battelle (pictured below). However Brin left the door open a little. Documents would be easier to work with in the future, he promised, but he didn't think a fat client was the way to go.

Web 2.0 organizer John Battelle"I don't really think that the thing is to take a previous generation of technology and port them directly," he told Battelle. However distributed thin web applications allowed you to do "new and better things than the Office package and more."

It puts the end to a week of feverish speculation prompted on Monday by an announcement that Sun and Google were going to team up to do something ... er, really, really big.

In the end, the only news was the disclosure that Sun would bundle Google's Toolbar in its Java RunTime download.

But, was that really all?

Google book author Battelle himself cogitated for 30 hours before delivering his verdict.

In a post entitled Google-Sun - The Toolbar, Ay, There's the Rub - he pondered: "Seems the push is on to get more Toolbars downloaded," following up with the slightly more confident: "And now, I see why Google is doing this Sun deal. It's the Toolbar, of course!" ... and concluded with the emphatic: "In other words, Google really, really wants more Toolbar distribution."

No, way!

You can't sneak anything past this guy.

Cynics suggested that the deal had more to do with bumping up Sun stock price - and trying to crash the Exchange scheduling server up in Redmond - than anything concrete. If that was the intention, at least one part of the strategy worked: NASDAQ sensors had detected a pulse in the moribund SUNW stock by Monday afternoon.

However, we have heard that there are parts of the Sun Google tie-up that so far haven't been publicly disclosed. And these are far more significant. We can't confirm the authenticity of any these details, but apparently the deal includes -

  • Free Segway rides for Mr Schwartz, but no more than 10 minutes at a time
  • Mr Schmidt's old parking spot to be restored to its former glory, with new inscription "Extra Special Visitor"
  • Mr Schmidt undertakes to stop making "I divested more last week than you earned last year" gags on golf course
  • With 28 days notice, Sun is permitted non-exclusive use of Mr Senor for duties including, but not limited to, skull-crushing and other motivational tactics during next RIF program
  • Mr McNealy to return, and never mention again, gift of "I wasted my first bubble at Novell!" T-shirt
  • Google and Sun Microsystems to launch joint "There's No Such Thing As Privacy - Get Over It™" awareness campaign

So there you have it. Not of a word of that is true - but feel free to speculate anyway in 4,500 word blog post headlined "Google's Next Move" which includes pointless speculation containing the words "global operating system" "breathtakingly audatious" "rewiring the planet" and "StarFleet Command". ®

Picture credit: John C Dvorak

5 things you didn’t know about cloud backup

More from The Register

next story
The Return of BSOD: Does ANYONE trust Microsoft patches?
Sysadmins, you're either fighting fires or seen as incompetents now
Microsoft refuses to nip 'Windows 9' unzip lip slip
Look at the shiny Windows 8.1, why can't you people talk about 8.1, sobs an exec somewhere
Munich considers dumping Linux for ... GULP ... Windows!
Give a penguinista a hug, the Outlook's not good for open source's poster child
Intel's Raspberry Pi rival Galileo can now run Windows
Behold the Internet of Things. Wintel Things
Linux Foundation says many Linux admins and engineers are certifiable
Floats exam program to help IT employers lock up talent
Microsoft cries UNINSTALL in the wake of Blue Screens of Death™
Cache crash causes contained choloric calamity
Eat up Martha! Microsoft slings handwriting recog into OneNote on Android
Freehand input on non-Windows kit for the first time
prev story

Whitepapers

Implementing global e-invoicing with guaranteed legal certainty
Explaining the role local tax compliance plays in successful supply chain management and e-business and how leading global brands are addressing this.
7 Elements of Radically Simple OS Migration
Avoid the typical headaches of OS migration during your next project by learning about 7 elements of radically simple OS migration.
BYOD's dark side: Data protection
An endpoint data protection solution that adds value to the user and the organization so it can protect itself from data loss as well as leverage corporate data.
Consolidation: The Foundation for IT Business Transformation
In this whitepaper learn how effective consolidation of IT and business resources can enable multiple, meaningful business benefits.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?