Feeds

Superman has small todger: official

No super powers in the trouser department

Combat fraud and increase customer satisfaction

It's official: Superman may be able to leap a tall building with a single bound but he's completely lacking super powers in the trouser department.

That, at least, is according to those charged with costuming Brandon Routh who will play the Man of Steel in next year's Superman Returns. According to MSNBC, costume designer Louise Mingenbach says that of all the internet speculation surrounding Superman's costume, the vast majority focused on his trunks.

Explained the deliciously-surnamed Mingenbach: "There was more discussion about Superman's 'package' than anything else on the suit. Was it too big? Was it not big enough? Was it too pointy? Too round? It was somebody's job for about a month just working on codpiece shapes. It was crazy."

The mind boggles. Just how pointy does Superman's schlong have to be before Middle America reaches for its Bible and its assault rifle?

Sadly, we may never know, because Mingenbach's final verdict on our hero's wedding tackle is: "Not big. Ten-year-olds will be seeing this movie."

Readers will be able to judge for themselves just how deprived Lois Lane is when Superman Returns opens in June next year. ®

High performance access to file storage

More from The Register

next story
Spanish village called 'Kill the Jews' mulls rebranding exercise
Not exactly attractive to the Israeli tourist demographic
Oz bank in comedy Heartbleed blog FAIL
Bank: 'We are now safely patched.' Customers: 'You were using OpenSSL?'
Happy 40th Playmobil: Reg looks back at small, rude world of our favourite tiny toys
Little men straddle LOHAN, attend tiny G20 Summit... ah, sweet memories...
Forget the beach 'n' boardwalk, check out the Santa Cruz STEVE JOBS FOUNTAIN
Reg reader snaps shot of touching tribute to Apple icon
Lego is the TOOL OF SATAN, thunders Polish priest
New minifigs like Monster Fighters are turning kids to the dark side
Dark SITH LORD 'Darth Vader' joins battle to rule, er, Ukraine
Only I can 'make an empire out of a republic' intones presidential candidate
Chinese company counters pollution by importing fresh air
Citizens line up for bags of that sweet, sweet mountain air
Google asks April Fools: Want a job? Be our 'Pokemon Master'
Mountain View is prankin' like it's 1999...
prev story

Whitepapers

Securing web applications made simple and scalable
In this whitepaper learn how automated security testing can provide a simple and scalable way to protect your web applications.
3 Big data security analytics techniques
Applying these Big Data security analytics techniques can help you make your business safer by detecting attacks early, before significant damage is done.
The benefits of software based PBX
Why you should break free from your proprietary PBX and how to leverage your existing server hardware.
Top three mobile application threats
Learn about three of the top mobile application security threats facing businesses today and recommendations on how to mitigate the risk.
Combat fraud and increase customer satisfaction
Based on their experience using HP ArcSight Enterprise Security Manager for IT security operations, Finansbank moved to HP ArcSight ESM for fraud management.