Feeds

Zotob worm perps: hanging's too good for 'em

Straight talk on violence, surveys and 'mobes'

  • alert
  • submit to reddit

Beginner's guide to SSL certificates

Letters From time to time, we at Vulture Central get emails berating us for printing what readers say are straight plugs for companies disguised as fascinating and informative surveys or analysis pieces. This one is typical:

Shame on you for publishing such a shameless ad posing as a news item:

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2005/08/30/it_contractors_neglect_insurance/

I'm a contractor and I think I speak for all of us when I say we're painfully aware of the problems we face, in particular when it comes to IR35 and the revenue. Having someone who is peddling the solution-for-all-our-needs state the bleedin' obvious isn't really a great help.

I look forward to your next piece entitled \"Shock Research Proves Computers Use Electricity\". Perhaps this piece will be sponsored by a mobo manufacturer or a PSU vendor?

Maybe you're just easing yourself into a slow news day after a good long weekend?

Cheers

Mike

In fact, our forthcoming shock expose on the link between alternating current, plug sockets and electrical equipment will be sponsored by a company called Powergen. Apparently they have an interest of some sort in electricity and their selfless contribution to the piece - in terms of amazing stats and factoids and quotes from the CEO warning of the dangers of not buying Powergen's 'leccy - allows us to ease ourselves effortlessly into a stagnant news day after a particularly robust weekend.

Your point about the bleedin' obvious has been duly noted, however.

Now, the UK's government is to clamp down on violent porn. A good show, we reckon, but what about other violent stuff, cries Chris Bradshaw?:

Why not also ban distribution and possession of non-pornographic violent material while they are at it? Videos of terrorists beheading unwilling civilians should be just as abhorrent to society (well, decent society anyway), and can cause the same effect (beheadings or similar terrorist activity).

The law could also be used as a proveable and punishable offence against those who have allegedly planned a terrorist act but against whom there is little or no hard evidence, similar to the way that the Mafia capos in the US were prosecuted for tax evasion when no-one would testify against them.

We think it's fair to say that if we in the civilised world ever get our hands on Abu Mohammed al-Zarqawi (the alleged murderer of Ken Bigley), then the footage of his outrages would certainly feature heavily in the case for the prosecution. God alone knows, though, how anyone can stop this kind of stuff, with a porn content or otherwise, from circulating - especially via the web.

We're reminded of the UK's "video nasties" bruhaha years back when an enraged Thatcher government banned a veritable bloodbath of highly unpleasant flicks including I Spit on your Grave, Snuff, and the quite remarkable SS Experiment Camp. Naturally, and despite the threat of heavy penalties for even looking at a copy of any of the aforementioned from a distance of three miles, all were readily available if you knew the right North London video rental shop.

And the reason we call SS Experiment Camp remarkable? Because it contained the immortal line: "You bastard - you stole my balls!" They certainly don't make 'em like that any more.

So, we've caged Abu Mohammed al-Zarqawi. What do we do with the bugger? Try this, from Randy:

These SCUMBAGS should be castrated with a branding iron, then hung by their thumbs for a month, then stoned in a public forum.

Actually, Randy is suggesting a suitable punishment for the two men recently cuffed in connection with the Zotob worm outbreak, but we like the cut of his jib.

More ne'er-do-wellishness now, with Mark Hackett commenting on the case of the stolen Windows source code fence, William P. Genovese:

How can a trade secret be copyrighted? You must publish a work to get it copyrighted. That means it isn't a trade secret.

Greedy buggers want to have their cake and eat it too (and take anyone else's if there's the opportunity).

Sigh

A fair point. Concluding this "Crime and Punishment" round-up, is Andy Bright on online gaming misdemeanours, the most recent of which was the password-snaffling worm menace:

It's like the guy who was arrested recently for mugging online characters, stealing their imaginary stuff and selling it online.

What's more sad - that people actually pay to cheat at computer games, or that other people start crying if they lose all the stuff they wasted six years of their lives collecting in a pretend universe?

Spare me from cry baby online gamers...

We'll make no comment as to how lachrimose online gamers may be, and wrap up today's missives with the news that we have once again been taken to task for our shocking abuse of the elegant lingo that is yer Maj Liz Two's Queen's English:

Please stop the staff from using the term "mobe" :(

No chance, not at least until the above correspondent stops calling himself "Bob". Enough said and a jolly weekend to you all. ®

Lucy Sherriff is on light shopping leave.

Top 5 reasons to deploy VMware with Tegile

More from The Register

next story
Criticism of Uber's journo-Data Analytics plan is an Attack on DIGITAL FREEDOM
First they came for Emil – and I'm damn well SPEAKING OUT
'It is comforting to know where your data centres are.' UK.GOV does NOT
Plus: Anons are 'wannabes', KKK says, before being pwned
Google's whois results say it's a lousy smut searcher
Run whois google.com or whois microsoft.com. We dare you, you PIG◙◙◙◙ER
Holy vintage vehicles! Earliest known official Batmobile goes on sale
Riddle me this: are you prepared to pay US$180k?
'Open source just means big companies can steal your code.' O RLY?
Plus: Flame of the Week returns, for one night only!
NEWSFLASH: It's time to ditch dullard Facebook chums
Everything hot in tech, courtesy of avian anchor Regina Eggbert
Hey, you, PHONE-FACE! Kickstarter in-car mobe mount will EMBED your phone into your MUG
Stick it on the steering wheel and wait for the airbag to fire
prev story

Whitepapers

Designing and building an open ITOA architecture
Learn about a new IT data taxonomy defined by the four data sources of IT visibility: wire, machine, agent, and synthetic data sets.
A strategic approach to identity relationship management
ForgeRock commissioned Forrester to evaluate companies’ IAM practices and requirements when it comes to customer-facing scenarios versus employee-facing ones.
5 critical considerations for enterprise cloud backup
Key considerations when evaluating cloud backup solutions to ensure adequate protection security and availability of enterprise data.
Reg Reader Research: SaaS based Email and Office Productivity Tools
Read this Reg reader report which provides advice and guidance for SMBs towards the use of SaaS based email and Office productivity tools.
Protecting users from Firesheep and other Sidejacking attacks with SSL
Discussing the vulnerabilities inherent in Wi-Fi networks, and how using TLS/SSL for your entire site will assure security.