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Car self-destructs in assassination bid

Frenchman shaken after terror ordeal

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A middle-aged Frenchman has become the latest victim of murderous technology after his car exploded as he activated the central locking system.

The unnamed victim from Valenciennes used his electronic key to unlock the vehicle, at which point a spark from the security system ignited leaked gas from cylinders the man had rather ill-advisedly stored in the boot. The car was completely totalled in the blast, while the flying Frenchman as whisked to hospital with facial injuries.

The make of the car is not noted, but we suspect that it may be a Renault - a brand known to enjoy kidnapping drivers as part of the international technological conspiracy to enslave humanity. ®

Bootnote

Merci beaucoup to Rory Bourke for spotting this latest manifestation of killer technology.

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