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Boris Johnson website falls eerily silent

No foppish wit from Tory lothario? For shame

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There is a distinct lack of foppish wit and public school drollery to be had this morning down at the website of sacked shadow Arts minister Boris Johnson — made to walk the plank over the weekend after allegedly lying to Conservative supremo Michael Howard over an affair with luscious blue-blood hackette Petronella Wyatt.

Howard, mindful of his party's rock-solid repuation for personal and professional integrity coupled to an absolute committment to upholding the moral values of Middle England, ditched the wisecracking Henley MP after shocking tabloid revelations that he had been indugling in aristo rumpy-pumpy with the aforementioned Wyatt.

Sadly, although Johnson has been defending himself resolutely to the press this morning, his website is strangely silent. Indeed, the best he can offer is this rather feeble message under a "Media Maelstrom" headline:

Great of you to log on to Boris Johnson's website.

We are snowed under at the moment, but will be ready to resume later on this week with Boris's next posting.

All comments options will be frozen in the meantime.

For shame. Interestingly, though, Johnson's last entry before his fall from political grace is entitled "Special relationship or one-way street?". It begins:

Can someone just remind me about this Special Relationship business. I know it's very wonderful and important, and I know the whole country will be sitting on the edge of their sofas and dabbing their eyes...

Yes, that's right Boris. The whole nation is as we speak sitting on the edge of its sofa and dabbing its eyes at the consequences of your very own "special relationship" which led you inexorably down a one-way street to the back benches. We imagine that the people of Liverpool are particularly upset by your predicament. ®

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