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Gasping for a pint? Text GOODPUB

Life-saving service for Morris dancers

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Internet Security Threat Report 2014

Imagine this nightmare scenario: you and your Morris-dancing mates are in the minibus having just completed a seven-hour stick-bashing session at the Little Pizzle Cyder Fayre. Your throats are drier than a silica gel maker's handshake, the Hobby Horse needs the loo sharpish and the heavily-embearded driver has been struck by the sudden urge to sing acapella Norfolk oyster-raking shanties to an appreciative audience of folkies. The problem is, it's dark, you're lost and you've simply drunk too much cyder to read the map. What's your next move?

Step forward the Good Pub Guide, which as of right now is offering to point you in the direction of the nearest approved hostelry for a mere 50p plus network charges. That's right - you simply text GOODPUB to 85130 and in a jiffy you'll receive the location of the most proximate public house as recommended by The Good Pub Guide 2005. What's more, if you've got a WAPtastic colour display mobe, you can access street maps which will lead you to liquid salvation.

And it gets better. Reply to the original message within two hours with the word NEXT and you'll be sent details of another nearby inn - thus enabling the SMS pubcrawl.

The service is offered in conjunction with iTAGG, which apparently uses triangulation to pinpoint your mobe's position to within one cell. Instructions are then dispatched accordingly. We have received assurances from iTAGG's PR representative that the company will not be offering a parallel service by which enraged spouses will be informed as to which pub their giddy partner is most likely to be at that moment warbling Scottish crofters' laments to a backdrop of lutes and bodhrans. ®

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