Feeds

Reg reader in Intel Shroud epiphany

Jesus really is inside

  • alert
  • submit to reddit

Combat fraud and increase customer satisfaction

The revelation yesterday that one UK church had swiped Intel's "intel inside" concept and turned it to the service of the Lord provoked a veritable mass exodus of emails from El Reg readers.

Most were pointing out that the "jesus inside" gag had been around since, well, let's put it this way: Methuselah himself probably wore a t-shirt bearing some variation on the theme when he was a lad.

We have, however, uncovered astounding evidence that the church in question may, in fact, have official approval from the top for its particular poster campaign. Reader Paul Lomax explains:

Hi,

After seeing Gareth's response to you regarding the telephone number on the Jesus Inside poster, I thought I'd open the image in photoshop to try and read the number. After opening I spotted a strange pattern emerging, so tried inverting the image to make it clearer.

The darnedest thing appeared which I thought you should see!

Wierd huh?

Epiphany or sophisticated forgery?

Remarkable. Our experts have offered two possible explanations for this "Intel Shroud":

  • That it is a sophisticated forgery perpetrated using advanced image-manipulation techniques.
  • That it is irrefutable evidence that Jesus Christ himself was in close proximity to the offset litho machine when the posters were printed.

We make no further comment except to say that Intel's lawyers and the Vatican have been alerted to this alleged epiphany. ®

Related stories

God violates Intel trademark
Miracle cures Berkeley man of Itanic wickedness
Analyst sees St.Fister in Itanic wafer
I am Centrino, son of Banias
Online church smites sinners
C of E seeks dynamic cybervicar

3 Big data security analytics techniques

More from The Register

next story
Forget the beach 'n' boardwalk, check out the Santa Cruz STEVE JOBS FOUNTAIN
Reg reader snaps shot of touching tribute to Apple icon
Oz bank in comedy Heartbleed blog FAIL
Bank: 'We are now safely patched.' Customers: 'You were using OpenSSL?'
Happy 40th Playmobil: Reg looks back at small, rude world of our favourite tiny toys
Little men straddle LOHAN, attend tiny G20 Summit... ah, sweet memories...
Spanish village called 'Kill the Jews' mulls rebranding exercise
Not exactly attractive to the Israeli tourist demographic
Lego is the TOOL OF SATAN, thunders Polish priest
New minifigs like Monster Fighters are turning kids to the dark side
Dark SITH LORD 'Darth Vader' joins battle to rule, er, Ukraine
Only I can 'make an empire out of a republic' intones presidential candidate
Chinese company counters pollution by importing fresh air
Citizens line up for bags of that sweet, sweet mountain air
Google asks April Fools: Want a job? Be our 'Pokemon Master'
Mountain View is prankin' like it's 1999...
prev story

Whitepapers

Designing a defence for mobile apps
In this whitepaper learn the various considerations for defending mobile applications; from the mobile application architecture itself to the myriad testing technologies needed to properly assess mobile applications risk.
3 Big data security analytics techniques
Applying these Big Data security analytics techniques can help you make your business safer by detecting attacks early, before significant damage is done.
Five 3D headsets to be won!
We were so impressed by the Durovis Dive headset we’ve asked the company to give some away to Reg readers.
The benefits of software based PBX
Why you should break free from your proprietary PBX and how to leverage your existing server hardware.
Securing web applications made simple and scalable
In this whitepaper learn how automated security testing can provide a simple and scalable way to protect your web applications.