Feeds

Guantanamo Bay loses 'least worst place' status - Navy

Photoshop chop

  • alert
  • submit to reddit

Secure remote control for conventional and virtual desktops

On a scale of worst, how worst can worst get? Back in 2001, Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld took a crack at solving this riddle, dubbing Guantanamo Bay "the least worst place" to store evil-doers. But now, with the torture scandal unfolding, the Navy has declared that Guantanamo Bay is not "the least worst place" at all.

The Navy once embraced the "least worst place" Rumsfeldism proudly, displaying the slogan across the banner of its Guantanamo Bay web site. The witty motto made the Cuban prison seem not so bad, especially if you consider the palm trees and excellent views.

Picture of Guantanamo banner with "least worst" writtenTimes, however, change, and when a new commanding officer for the prison - Captain Les McCoy - took over near the end of 2003, he ordered a Photoshop job on the "least worst place" banner, removing the slogan all together.

"The removal was ordered because the commanding officer did not feel it accurately reflected his vision of the base," said Navy spokesman Lieutenant Mike Kafka.

(Yes, you're reading that correctly. A man named Kafka has been deployed to field questions about a prison where the criminals are only vaguely charged with crimes, can't speak to lawyers and likely will never get out.)

According to Navy sources, it may be acceptable for a slogan such as "the least worst place" to find its way onto a uniform patch, but it's really not meant to serve as the welcome wagon for a penal colony.

New banner without "least worst"Lt. Kafka declined to discuss whether this site change implied that Guantanamo Bay was still the least worst place. But another Navy worker told us, "You know some commanding officers come in and there is a picture of a sunset on their web site, and they decide they want a sunrise. You know, so they can start with a big bang. This is like that."

So, near the end of 2003, Cpt. McCoy pulled the banner and relegated the most famous Rumsfeldism to obscurity. All you'll find on the Guantanamo Bay site these days is a Red Cuba with an American flag thrusting out of its rear, along with a calming blue background for the text. You'll see that the Vet Clinic is still open for business as well - but that, according to the site, is supposed to be for the household pets of stationed officers' families.

Did the recent prison torture scandal play a role in the banner's demise? Not according to the dates provided by the Navy's Lt. Kafka. The scandal broke at the end of April, and the Commanding Officer ordered the site change at some point last year, or so Lt. Kafka told us, "prior to January 2004". Still, McCoy's sensitivity and foresight was impressive any way you slice it.

And here's a cheer for Photoshop, where the least worst place can become ambiguously worst with just a few clicks of the mouse. ®

Related stories

Abu Ghraib: US security fiasco
RIAA punishing Navy cadets because it can
NASA to fight terror with mental telepathy

Secure remote control for conventional and virtual desktops

More from The Register

next story
Phones 4u slips into administration after EE cuts ties with Brit mobe retailer
More than 5,500 jobs could be axed if rescue mission fails
Apple CEO Tim Cook: TV is TERRIBLE and stuck in the 1970s
The iKing thinks telly is far too fiddly and ugly – basically, iTunes
Huawei ditches new Windows Phone mobe plans, blames poor sales
Giganto mobe firm slams door shut on Microsoft. OH DEAR
Phones 4u website DIES as wounded mobe retailer struggles to stay above water
Founder blames 'ruthless network partners' for implosion
Found inside ISIS terror chap's laptop: CELINE DION tunes
REPORT: Stash of terrorist material found in Syria Dell box
Show us your Five-Eyes SECRETS says Privacy International
Refusal to disclose GCHQ canteen menus and prices triggers Euro Human Rights Court action
prev story

Whitepapers

Secure remote control for conventional and virtual desktops
Balancing user privacy and privileged access, in accordance with compliance frameworks and legislation. Evaluating any potential remote control choice.
Saudi Petroleum chooses Tegile storage solution
A storage solution that addresses company growth and performance for business-critical applications of caseware archive and search along with other key operational systems.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?
Security for virtualized datacentres
Legacy security solutions are inefficient due to the architectural differences between physical and virtual environments.
Providing a secure and efficient Helpdesk
A single remote control platform for user support is be key to providing an efficient helpdesk. Retain full control over the way in which screen and keystroke data is transmitted.