Feeds

Dell in front line of War on Terror™

No PDAs for al-Qaeda, that's for sure

  • alert
  • submit to reddit

The essential guide to IT transformation

We're relieved to report today that al-Qaeda will not be sourcing PDAs online from US websites, well not from Dell at least.

Reader Stephen Mills alerted us to the company's stringent security checks which vet potential purchasers. As a result, we can sleep sounder in our beds safe in the knowledge that Osama bin Laden will not have the comfort of reading the new Register Mobile in whichever stinking hole in the ground he is currently occupying.

To demonstrate how the thing works, we signed into Dell's e-shop this morning using a fictitious US address and chucked the first PDA we saw in the shopping basket. On proceeding to the checkout, we were asked some probing questions, these included:

Thanks to Dell, we can all sleep sounder in our beds

Being an honest terrorist organisation, we frankly stated that the PDA was for export to Chad (Afghanistan, Iraq, Libya, North Korea and Syria being unavailable as options), that the intended use was government/military and that the product would indeed be used in connection with weapons of mass destruction.

Having pressed "continue" with some trepidation, we fully expected that, after a suitably dramatic pause, heavily-armed SWAT teams supported by spooks bearing a one-way ticket to Guantanamo Bay and nuke-laden stealth aircraft would surround the building demanding immediate surrender.

But no. Instead we were invited to proceed to the payments page and enter credit card details for immediate shipment. It was at this point that we made our excuses and left the Dell website.

Of course, it's likely that Dell's cunning plan involves taking the credit card payment for intelligence-gathering purposes and then sending in the helicopter gunships.

Either way, it would clearly take all of the cunning and guile of an evil criminal mastermind to penetrate such online defences. We salute Dell and its constant vigilance. ®

Next gen security for virtualised datacentres

More from The Register

next story
MEN WANTED to satisfy town full of yearning BRAZILIAN HOTNESS
'Prettier, better organised, more harmonious than if men were in charge'
Cops baffled by riddle of CHICKEN who crossed ROAD
'Officers were unable to determine Chicken's intent'
Yes, but what are your plans if a DRAGON attacks?
Local UK gov outs most ridiculous FoI requests...
Drunkards warned: If you can't walk in a straight line, don't shop online, you fool!
Put it away boys. Cover them up ladies. Your credit cards, we mean
Why your mum was WRONG about whiffy tattooed people
They're a future source of RENEWABLE ENERGY
Murder accused DIDN'T ask Siri 'how to hide my roommate'
US court hears of cached browser image - not actual request
Chomp that sausage: Brits just LOVE scoffing a Full Monty
Sales of traditional brekkie foods soar as hungry folk get their mitts greasy
prev story

Whitepapers

Implementing global e-invoicing with guaranteed legal certainty
Explaining the role local tax compliance plays in successful supply chain management and e-business and how leading global brands are addressing this.
Endpoint data privacy in the cloud is easier than you think
Innovations in encryption and storage resolve issues of data privacy and key requirements for companies to look for in a solution.
Why cloud backup?
Combining the latest advancements in disk-based backup with secure, integrated, cloud technologies offer organizations fast and assured recovery of their critical enterprise data.
Consolidation: The Foundation for IT Business Transformation
In this whitepaper learn how effective consolidation of IT and business resources can enable multiple, meaningful business benefits.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?