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Prince Charles tops UK Google 2003 top ten

But Britney rules worldwide

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Internet Security Threat Report 2014

Prince Charles, tree-hugging heir to the British throne, has topped the Google most wanted list for 2003, according to the search engine.

Our Charlie proved the most sought-after subject on the web after scurrilous allegations prompted a fact-starved UK public to scour the Net for tasty titbits.

This royal rumpus beat soap Eastenders into second spot and saw even rugby hero Jonny Wilkinson and David "Cojones de Oro" Beckham struggling to match his imperial majestyness' world-beating performance. The lads rated fourth and sixth places, respectively.

Third place went to Winnie the Pooh, a claim we find virtually impossible to believe. Apparently, it's got something to do with a merchandising brouhaha in the States, but the idea that a US legal punch-up would have Brits rushing to their computers is, frankly, absurd.

The rest of it is predictable enough. Heiress-come-pornatrix Paris Hilton and childcare guru Michael Jackson put in a respectable showing, and Easyjet™ will delight the masses with a no-frills fifth place:

  1. Prince Charles

  2. Eastenders

  3. Winnie the Pooh

  4. Jonny Wilkinson

  5. Easyjet

  6. David Beckham

  7. Michael Jackson

  8. 2 Fast 2 Furious

  9. Paris Hilton

  10. The Simpsons

Global net users, though, displayed rather more good taste during 2003, clicking highly talented all-American girl Britney Spears to the top of the search heirarchy. Our own Harry Potter can hold his head up high at No.2, with The Matrix running a close third:

  1. Britney Spears

  2. Harry Potter

  3. Matrix

  4. Shakira

  5. David Beckham

  6. 50 cent

  7. Iraq

  8. Lord of the Rings

  9. Kobe Bryant

  10. Tour de France

One thing conspicuous by its absence from both lists is Kazaa. Which is interesting because the file-sharing programme raced home to claim the Yahoo! title, published a week ago:

  1. Kazaa

  2. Harry Potter

  3. American Idol

  4. Britney Spears

  5. 50 Cent

  6. Eminem

  7. WWE

  8. Paris Hilton

  9. Nascar

  10. Christina Aguilera

You see - not a litigious bear in sight. ®

Bootnote

Google conspiracy theorists who can hear the distant drone of black helicopters hovering over the Kazaa anomaly are requested to direct their comments directly to the company. Please.

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