Feeds

US student seeks J-Loesque posterior

Givebooty.com begs for bigger butt

  • alert
  • submit to reddit

High performance access to file storage

Jennifer Lopez certainly is an inspiration to millions of Latin and black American women. After all, who wouldn't want a successful entertainment career, Ben Affleck as a beau and an arse the size of a Zeppelin?

Casting as it does a shadow over lesser behinds, Lopez's prodigious posterior has become the yardstick by which female buttocks are measured - and if you can't have the Hollywood lifestyle and celebrity fiancé, you can at least have the backside that goes with them.

That's the motivation driving 26-year-old US student Nicole, who has launched www.givebooty.com. You guessed it: Nicole's booty is woefully inadequate and she's looking to raise $6,000 to give her buns a boost.

We've been here before. Anyone with an interest in the quest for physical perfection will recall college girl Michelle and her underdeveloped frontage.

Michel needed $4,500 for a boob job and, in April this year, finally attained her mam-swelling target. Those with a purely scientific interest in her new assets can can enjoy them here.

Sadly, human skeleton Nicole has to date raised a paltry $155. As a result, her buttocks still resemble those of Geri Halliwell after six months on the Atkins Diet.

We pass no judgement on Nicole's arse, nor on her lust for the ultimate gluteus maximus, but rather allow her own FAQ to to answer the obvious question:

Q15: Aren't you just a pathetic copy of Michel from giveboobs.com?

A15: Michel wanted breast implants. I want a big butt. Michel has a cat. I have a dog named, Nikky. Michel has boots to sell on eBay. I don't. Michel is Asian. I am African-American. Although I love Asian men.



Nicole, love, you're missing a trick here. Boots on eBay=booty=bigger booty. And if that doesn't work, try dating Puff Daddy. That man is loaded. ®

High performance access to file storage

More from The Register

next story
Spanish village called 'Kill the Jews' mulls rebranding exercise
Not exactly attractive to the Israeli tourist demographic
Forget the beach 'n' boardwalk, check out the Santa Cruz STEVE JOBS FOUNTAIN
Reg reader snaps shot of touching tribute to Apple icon
Oz bank in comedy Heartbleed blog FAIL
Bank: 'We are now safely patched.' Customers: 'You were using OpenSSL?'
Happy 40th Playmobil: Reg looks back at small, rude world of our favourite tiny toys
Little men straddle LOHAN, attend tiny G20 Summit... ah, sweet memories...
Lego is the TOOL OF SATAN, thunders Polish priest
New minifigs like Monster Fighters are turning kids to the dark side
Dark SITH LORD 'Darth Vader' joins battle to rule, er, Ukraine
Only I can 'make an empire out of a republic' intones presidential candidate
Chinese company counters pollution by importing fresh air
Citizens line up for bags of that sweet, sweet mountain air
Google asks April Fools: Want a job? Be our 'Pokemon Master'
Mountain View is prankin' like it's 1999...
prev story

Whitepapers

Top three mobile application threats
Learn about three of the top mobile application security threats facing businesses today and recommendations on how to mitigate the risk.
Combat fraud and increase customer satisfaction
Based on their experience using HP ArcSight Enterprise Security Manager for IT security operations, Finansbank moved to HP ArcSight ESM for fraud management.
The benefits of software based PBX
Why you should break free from your proprietary PBX and how to leverage your existing server hardware.
Five 3D headsets to be won!
We were so impressed by the Durovis Dive headset we’ve asked the company to give some away to Reg readers.
SANS - Survey on application security programs
In this whitepaper learn about the state of application security programs and practices of 488 surveyed respondents, and discover how mature and effective these programs are.