Feeds

Reg to attend 3rd Annual Nigerian Email Conference

Brush up on your 419 skills

  • alert
  • submit to reddit

Combat fraud and increase customer satisfaction

Get rich quick scheme: Those readers interested in the potential fiscal benefits of unsolicited e-mail marketing might like to join key members of the Register Strategy Boutique in Nigeria this November for the 3rd Annual Nigerian EMail Conference.

We can heartily recommend this event - hosted by Mr. Laurent Mpeti Kabila, a senior assistant leader of the Revolutionary United Front of Sierra Leone - which will examine how best to liquidate the huge sums of money which regularly sit sadly unclaimed in African bank accounts.

Highlights of the event include:

  • Keynote Address: Dr. Hamza Kalu's adds some historical perspective in his keynote address: "From Postal Scams To Email Scams: We Have Come a Long Way Infant Child."

  • Debate: Attend a lively debate between Lady Mariam Abacha and Mr. Godwin Oyathelem. Topic: "The effectiveness of using all UPPERCASE characters."

  • Statistics: Dr. Kayode Naiyeju presents his ground-breaking research: "Analyzing response rates using analysis of variance: That pesky R-squared value," as published in The Nigerian Journal of Applied Statistics.

The event takes place on the 7-9 November 2003 at the Abuja Sheraton Hotel & Casino. The registration fee is a modest $995 per person. Send your bank's name, account number, your name, address, telephone number, and fax numbers. Please note again that this transaction is strictly confidential and as such should be kept secret. Be rest assured that this transaction is 100% risk free.



Kindly send the requested information (in complete confidence) to:

Nigerian EMail Conference
c/o Abuja Sheraton Hotel Abuja
Ladi Kwali Way Abuja, NG PMB 143.

Update

We have just received a letter concerning this 419 shindig, which we reprint here in full:

Dear Register,

Thank you for mentioning Nigeria so much in your press releases, you must have a great deal of interest in the country and be quite familiar withthe people, country and cultures. I do however have to take issue with the article above:

Your article does not make it clear that it is in fact a hoax, that there is no such conference taking place.

The fact that you say that you are attending said conference only gives the impression that it really is taking place.

If you are trying to be helpful (by informing people of the scam and making them aware of it) then that is entirely to your credit. In fact I've read several previous articles to that effect that were very constructive.

The lack of clarity in this particular article only gives the impression that your publication has ulterior motives for focussing on the '419' scam, and that being informative isn't actually what is on your agenda.I'm left with no choice but to presume that you are attempting to smear Nigeria, by giving the impression that a conference on criminal activity is taking place within a few miles of the heart of Abuja, the Federal Government capital, thereby implying implicit government approval of such activity.

You may feel that because you are only linking to a website which purports to be advertising this event, you are not actually misinforming people.

However the fact that you haven't made clear that the entire article is a joke only reinforces the impression that it is genuine, and I'm sure our associations lawyers will see what levels of culpability you can face. I will be sending a copy of this message to the Nigerian Embassy in the UK, as well as the CRE and the PCC. You could, however, pre-empt this by simply pointing out on your article that the article is in fact a joke.

I look forward to your response.

Best Regards,

Michael A Fabikun
MK Nigerian Association



Fair enough, here's our response:

Warning: Joke Alert

Will that do?

3 Big data security analytics techniques

More from The Register

next story
Forget the beach 'n' boardwalk, check out the Santa Cruz STEVE JOBS FOUNTAIN
Reg reader snaps shot of touching tribute to Apple icon
Oz bank in comedy Heartbleed blog FAIL
Bank: 'We are now safely patched.' Customers: 'You were using OpenSSL?'
Happy 40th Playmobil: Reg looks back at small, rude world of our favourite tiny toys
Little men straddle LOHAN, attend tiny G20 Summit... ah, sweet memories...
Lego is the TOOL OF SATAN, thunders Polish priest
New minifigs like Monster Fighters are turning kids to the dark side
Dark SITH LORD 'Darth Vader' joins battle to rule, er, Ukraine
Only I can 'make an empire out of a republic' intones presidential candidate
Chinese company counters pollution by importing fresh air
Citizens line up for bags of that sweet, sweet mountain air
Google asks April Fools: Want a job? Be our 'Pokemon Master'
Mountain View is prankin' like it's 1999...
prev story

Whitepapers

Designing a defence for mobile apps
In this whitepaper learn the various considerations for defending mobile applications; from the mobile application architecture itself to the myriad testing technologies needed to properly assess mobile applications risk.
3 Big data security analytics techniques
Applying these Big Data security analytics techniques can help you make your business safer by detecting attacks early, before significant damage is done.
Five 3D headsets to be won!
We were so impressed by the Durovis Dive headset we’ve asked the company to give some away to Reg readers.
The benefits of software based PBX
Why you should break free from your proprietary PBX and how to leverage your existing server hardware.
Securing web applications made simple and scalable
In this whitepaper learn how automated security testing can provide a simple and scalable way to protect your web applications.