Feeds

Hoaxster hacker discovers infinite-wealth algorithm

Pennies from Heaven

  • alert
  • submit to reddit

Reducing security risks from open source software

Hacker stunt-double and convicted financial fraudster Kim Schmitz (aka Kimble) is up to his old tricks, this time with a package of techno trickery for making a killing in the stock market. To satisfy the dreams of instant fortune common to those who believe in fairy tales, he's devised an "AI-based decision system" for share trading which scientifically "selects the optimal combination of trading strategies for current market conditions".

It's called Trendax, "the money-making machine," and it "uses a complex combination of sophisticated technical analysis, real-time content analysis of news feeds, multi-dimensional statistical analysis and advanced proprietary mathematical techniques," we're told.

If the technobabble alone isn't enough of a clue, we might recall that only last Summer a Munich court rewarded Schmitz with a twenty-month suspended
sentence for running a stock manipulation scam called Kimvestor expected to net him something in the range of $1.5 million.

Also at around that time, he'd been promoting his name and his scheme with the creation of a 31337 hacker crew called YIHAT (Young Intelligent Hackers Against Terrorism), which claimed to have penetrated Osama bin Laden's bank accounts and to be on the verge of locating him.

Undaunted by his near-jail experience, Schmitz has brought his enviable knowledge of computer science to bear in creating the all-seeing Trendax "AI Brain," a mighty digital oracle which boasts such features as "neural networks for market movements with multi-dimensional analysis of market conditions using proprietary indicators," and "lexical analysis, a natural language processor and machine learning." Even better, it possesses capabilities in "reverse optimization using various mathematical algorithms, fuzzy logic, genetic algorithms [and] evolutionary computing."

Minimum investments of $50,000 in the Trendax fund are now being accepted from those eager to enjoy a once-in-a-lifetime experience. ®

Eight steps to building an HP BladeSystem

More from The Register

next story
BBC goes offline in MASSIVE COCKUP: Stephen Fry partly muzzled
Auntie tight-lipped as major outage rolls on
iPad? More like iFAD: We reveal why Apple fell into IBM's arms
But never fear fanbois, you're still lapping up iPhones, Macs
Amazon Reveals One Weird Trick: A Loss On Almost $20bn In Sales
Investors really hate it: Share price plunge as growth SLOWS in key AWS division
Bose says today is F*** With Dre Day: Beats sued in patent battle
Music gear giant seeks some of that sweet, sweet Apple pie
There's NOTHING on TV in Europe – American video DOMINATES
Even France's mega subsidies don't stop US content onslaught
You! Pirate! Stop pirating, or we shall admonish you politely. Repeatedly, if necessary
And we shall go about telling people you smell. No, not really
Too many IT conferences to cover? MICROSOFT to the RESCUE!
Yet more word of cuts emerges from Redmond
Chips are down at Broadcom: Thousands of workers laid off
Cellphone baseband device biz shuttered
Twitch rich as Google flicks $1bn hitch switch, claims snitch
Gameplay streaming biz and search king refuse to deny fresh gobble rumors
prev story

Whitepapers

Top three mobile application threats
Prevent sensitive data leakage over insecure channels or stolen mobile devices.
Implementing global e-invoicing with guaranteed legal certainty
Explaining the role local tax compliance plays in successful supply chain management and e-business and how leading global brands are addressing this.
Boost IT visibility and business value
How building a great service catalog relieves pressure points and demonstrates the value of IT service management.
Designing a Defense for Mobile Applications
Learn about the various considerations for defending mobile applications - from the application architecture itself to the myriad testing technologies.
Build a business case: developing custom apps
Learn how to maximize the value of custom applications by accelerating and simplifying their development.