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Captain Cyborg takes the pee on Radio 5 Live

Mystery of why BT landlines play up in summer solved

Captain Cyborg, aka Kevin Warwick, has being talking urine during his latest promotional outing.

By this we're not referring to the contents of his latest tome, I Cyborg, but hitherto little publicised details of his early career.

The subject of urine came out when our favourite self-promoting robotics expert told listeners of BBC Radio 5 Live about his early career as a technician with BT (or the GPO as it was known as at the time).

Telephone cables sometimes played up at times of drought, Kevin told us, the solution to which was to water them with a can, or something else. (Yes, we know this goes against everything your science teacher told you about water and electricity not mixing but stay with us here).

On one occasion, the young Kevin was called out on a job when his colleague was caught short.

The young lad decided to relieve himself in the ground and when the pair visited the customer's premises they were cheerfully told that the phones had now started working again.

Amazing.

In 1985, as a trainee engineer with Cable & Wireless, I went out on a few shifts with cable crews in Bahrain. We never once had to water our phone cables, and no-one mentioned the practice to me - which makes me think Kevin is, in every sense, taking the piss.

But I digress.

After relating details of his latest experiment, which involved the implantation of a chip in his arm, Kevin held forth on his usual themes of cyborgs supplanting humanity before fielding a few questions from listeners.

He took calls from people with genuine medical problems, such as Multiple Sclerosis, querying whether Kevin's technology could be applied to help alleviate their condition.

Thankfully, Kev didn't dispense any medical advice. Instead he preferred to focus on the exciting possibilities his research purportly opens up.

Kevin, who came on the show with his largely silent wife Irena, was quizzed about whether his latest experiment was the culmination of his scientific endeavours.

Sadly not.

Kevin reckons that by placing an implant in a person's brain, thought communication might be possible within 10-15 years.

We're convinced. What we really want to know is what does Kevin think of trepanning? ®

Related Stories

Don't know what the fuss is about? Here are two classics from Kieren McCarthy to get you up to speed:
Home truths: Bionic man takes the Metal Mickey
Kevin Warwick: a life in pictures
Finally, here's a link to The Register's extensive coverage of Captain Cyborg.

External link

A rejoinder to Kev's more fanciful flights of fancy (article by Dave Green, co-editor of ntk.net, published by the BBC)

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