Murder most horrid haunts Sircam Merger

Don Capellas, get your gun

The streets of Houston and Silicon Valley will flow with blood if the merger between Hewlett Packard and Compaq goes through, Carly Fiorina promised yesterday.

Or at least that's what we think she said.

She made the terrifying promise in an interview with CNet yesterday, as this headline illustrates.

Chief Executioner

Rock and roll chip assassin Don Capellas - who earned his name by sending the Alpha processor to sleep with the fishes - is likely to figure highly in the plan.

"The biggest risk of the merger is not strategy, but execution," Fiorina told CNet

Indeed. It's a very messy business disposing of the bodies, and cleaning away the blood.

But we expect that in time honored fashion, the details will be delegated to the HR (Human Remains) Department.

This ruthless approach to reducing the headcount in the merged HPaq probably isn't what founders Hewlett and Packard had in mind when they mapped out the "HP Way," but as Carly says, times change.

So our warning to HP and Compaq employees: be careful out there, and be especially careful here

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