Feeds

BOFHs to blame for LAN downtime after all

Guns don't kill people - routers do

  • alert
  • submit to reddit

The Power of One Brief: Top reasons to choose HP BladeSystem

Note: this email contains traces of irony, which may cause small children to choke.


I have just read your article regarding the Top 10 reasons for LAN downtime. I personally think it could be modified to look like so below...

2nd line Support, resolving the below because of....

1 Crap Network Team:-) Misconfigured routers: devices installed incorrectly in the first instance

2 Crap Network Team:-) Faulty Ethernet cards: poor quality cards that fail soon after installation, but take some time to detect

3 Crap Network Team:-) Broadcast storms: caused by legacy applications on legacy servers, which should have been taken out of commission

4 Crap Network Team:-) Unwanted protocols: many networks suffer from having had Windows terminals, printers and other peripherals installed along with extra protocols, but these are left on the network when they are no longer in regular use

5 Crap Network Team:-) Poor switch allocation: LAN bottlenecks caused by too many devices being allocated to run through one overloaded switch

6 Crap Network Team:-) Server overloading: poor ongoing maintenance of file servers causing slow spots on the network

7 Crap Network Team:-) Faulty devices: fundamental faults with devices attached to the network, which can be difficult to detect initially

8 Crap Network Team:-) SNMP management tools: the design of Simple Network Management Protocol (SNMP) is such that it can impact the performance of the devices being managed and adds to the traffic burden on the network.

9 Crap Network Team:-) Rogue equipment: unauthorised connection of illegitimate or inappropriate devices to the network

10 Crap Network Team:-) Power outage: the total failure of power supplies to networked devices

"Mad Nutter"

This week's mailbag

'Pimply Assed' programmer's girlfriend demands T-shirt
Bugger Hastings
Zeus - not what the Doctor ordered?
BOFHs to blame for LAN downtime after all
The Sun doesn't shine on yacc
In Jedi We Trust

The smart choice: opportunity from uncertainty

More from The Register

next story
NSA man: 'Tell me about your Turkish connections'
Spooks ask Dabbsy to suggest a nice hotel with pool
Russia sends SEX-CRAZED GECKOS to SPAAAAACE!
In space... no one can hear you're green...
Carlos: Slim your working week to just three days of toil
'Midas World' vision suggests you retire later, watch more tellie and buy more stuff
Yahoo! Japan! launches! service! for! the! dead!
If you're reading this email, I am no longer alive
Plucky Rockall podule man back on (proper) dry land
Bold, barmy Brit adventurer Nick Hancock escapes North Atlantic islet
Motorist 'thought car had caught fire' as Adele track came on stereo
'FIRE' caption on dashboard prompts dunderheaded hard shoulder halt
prev story

Whitepapers

Implementing global e-invoicing with guaranteed legal certainty
Explaining the role local tax compliance plays in successful supply chain management and e-business and how leading global brands are addressing this.
Consolidation: The Foundation for IT Business Transformation
In this whitepaper learn how effective consolidation of IT and business resources can enable multiple, meaningful business benefits.
Application security programs and practises
Follow a few strategies and your organization can gain the full benefits of open source and the cloud without compromising the security of your applications.
How modern custom applications can spur business growth
Learn how to create, deploy and manage custom applications without consuming or expanding the need for scarce, expensive IT resources.
Securing Web Applications Made Simple and Scalable
Learn how automated security testing can provide a simple and scalable way to protect your web applications.