Feeds

Readers' Letters ‘Antrocentric’ Haines gets dolphin death threat

'Chicken of the Sea' not happy

  • alert
  • submit to reddit

Combat fraud and increase customer satisfaction

LogoWatch MySQL swims with the dolphins

It seems that Lester Haines has offended some of the more marine-sensitive members of the Register readership with his comments on the shortcomings of dolphins. One reader, who asked to be identified only as "Chicken of the Sea", took it upon himself to gently point this out:

You IDIOT!

You wrote:

"What dolphins know about the Internet can be written on the back of a very small piece of kelp".

What kind of antrocentric comment is that! If a dolphin was reading this (and I assure you that they can read if they have to) they would be writing this message instead of me and they would be outraged about this slam against their intellectual abilities.

Just because dolphins have not developed a written language (due to the physical configuration of their fins) doesn't mean they don't know anything. Their oral history is filled with historical events stretching past our human history and including events where the historical record has been lost such as the disappearance of Atlantis and several of the stories of Titanic victims which were recounted to dolphins on the way down.

I suggest you retract this statement before you hit the beach next time. This is not a threat, but some dolphins are not the cuddly creatures that one might imagine.

Indeed. And, although Mr Haines has not retracted the statement, it has been whispered to the Letters Desk that he will be staying away from salt water expanses for the foreseeable future.

More dolphin-friendly reader comments can be found here.

Best of the Rest

FOTW
"The design sucks, you suck, the whole frikin' site sucks"

Reg reader quits in quest for journalistic truth
Enough is enough when it comes to Thomas C Greene

Sensitive dotcommers get more birds!
Reg reader dishes out priceless pulling tips

"I say fry him!
Tough sentence for screensaver downloader

Stripper story leaves techies confused
It's all too much for some people

And that concludes this week's madness. ®

Top three mobile application threats

More from The Register

next story
Och aye! It's the Loch Ness Monster – but only Apple fanbois can see it
Fondleslab-friendly beastie's wake spotted... OR WAS IT?
Japanese boffin EYES up big bucks with strap-on digi-glasses
AgencyGlass saddles user with creepy OLED display
Sleuths find nosy NORKS drones on the Chinternet
UAVs likely to have been made in the Middle Kingdom
Spanish village called 'Kill the Jews' mulls rebranding exercise
Not exactly attractive to the Israeli tourist demographic
Dorian Nakamoto gets $23,000 payout over Bitcoin invention saga
Maintains he didn't create cryptocurrency, but will join community
Pirate Bay's 10 millionth upload: Colour us shocked, a SMUT FLICK
P2P badboys show online piracy is alive and humping
Teen girl arrested with 70-year-old man's four inch weapon inside her
Charged with introducing .22 snubbie to penile facility. It wasn't firing blanks
Oz bank in comedy Heartbleed blog FAIL
Bank: 'We are now safely patched.' Customers: 'You were using OpenSSL?'
Forget the beach 'n' boardwalk, check out the Santa Cruz STEVE JOBS FOUNTAIN
Reg reader snaps shot of touching tribute to Apple icon
prev story

Whitepapers

Securing web applications made simple and scalable
In this whitepaper learn how automated security testing can provide a simple and scalable way to protect your web applications.
3 Big data security analytics techniques
Applying these Big Data security analytics techniques can help you make your business safer by detecting attacks early, before significant damage is done.
The benefits of software based PBX
Why you should break free from your proprietary PBX and how to leverage your existing server hardware.
Mainstay ROI - Does application security pay?
In this whitepaper learn how you and your enterprise might benefit from better software security.
Combat fraud and increase customer satisfaction
Based on their experience using HP ArcSight Enterprise Security Manager for IT security operations, Finansbank moved to HP ArcSight ESM for fraud management.