Feeds

Topless tart gets fiesty over Net download record

Worried about Nora Batty no doubt

  • alert
  • submit to reddit

The Power of One Infographic

The battle over the most downloaded woman on the Internet has got hotter with American slapper Danni Ashe declaring her claim to the throne and dissing other international wannabes. Danni takes this very seriously as you can see from her Web site which lists how many times more downloaded she is over every other woman in the world.

Cindy Margolis? Pah! Our Danni is 15 times more "bigger" than her, according to danni.com (we've seen the pictures and reckon 1.6 tops). Britney Spears? Better, but no cookie. Danni is 2.9 times more a woman than she is. Bizarrely Oprah Winfrey is closer with 2.7 times. But the nearest is Carol Cox at just 1.5 times smaller (who the hell is Carol Cox? A "famous Internet amateur/swinger who has been online since 1995").

So what sparked this controversy and caused even BusinessWire to write a piece about her? The upshot Australians with their Sarah Jane and us in Blighty with the far superior Nora Batty (aka actress Kathy Staff).

The Aussies has been making a hullabaloo about how Sarah Jane will break the Guinness Book of Records on 1 August by being the most downloaded woman in a day (70,000 downloads they're after, and they promise some saucy snaps to entice you).

Danni don't like this, so she's gone to the press saying: "There's been a great deal of misinformation and confusion I'd like to clear up for everyone's benefit [whose benefit exactly?]. Guinness World Records is currently refusing to award new 'download' titles due to their self-confessed inability to measure Web site statistics. I've put them in touch with three highly respected independent third parties, but they don't seem ready to move forward in this area."

Apart form being a bit of a loon, Danni has a certain kind of dirty appeal that can always guarantee a wide audience. She's certainly not shy. Sarah Jane on the other hand goes for the more refined sauce element of society. And as for Nora Batty, well, she stands miles apart from the competition through her realistic and unconquerable womanhood.

Danni has every right to be worried. Especially if Nora runs into her.

If you want to see Danni's obsessive protectionism go here. ®

Related Story

Fellow Brits unite! As one behind Nora Batty

Mobile application security vulnerability report

More from The Register

next story
BBC goes offline in MASSIVE COCKUP: Stephen Fry partly muzzled
Auntie tight-lipped as major outage rolls on
There's NOTHING on TV in Europe – American video DOMINATES
Even France's mega subsidies don't stop US content onslaught
You! Pirate! Stop pirating, or we shall admonish you politely. Repeatedly, if necessary
And we shall go about telling people you smell. No, not really
Airbus promises Wi-Fi – yay – and 3D movies (meh) in new A330
If the person in front reclines their seat, this could get interesting
UK Parliament rubber-stamps EMERGENCY data grab 'n' keep bill
Just 49 MPs oppose Drip's rushed timetable
Want to beat Verizon's slow Netflix? Get a VPN
Exec finds stream speed climbs when smuggled out
Samsung threatens to cut ties with supplier over child labour allegations
Vows to uphold 'zero tolerance' policy on underage workers
Dude, you're getting a Dell – with BITCOIN: IT giant slurps cryptocash
1. Buy PC with Bitcoin. 2. Mine more coins. 3. Goto step 1
prev story

Whitepapers

Top three mobile application threats
Prevent sensitive data leakage over insecure channels or stolen mobile devices.
The Essential Guide to IT Transformation
ServiceNow discusses three IT transformations that can help CIO's automate IT services to transform IT and the enterprise.
Mobile application security vulnerability report
The alarming realities regarding the sheer number of applications vulnerable to attack, and the most common and easily addressable vulnerability errors.
How modern custom applications can spur business growth
Learn how to create, deploy and manage custom applications without consuming or expanding the need for scarce, expensive IT resources.
Consolidation: the foundation for IT and business transformation
In this whitepaper learn how effective consolidation of IT and business resources can enable multiple, meaningful business benefits.