Feeds

Topless tart gets fiesty over Net download record

Worried about Nora Batty no doubt

  • alert
  • submit to reddit

Boost IT visibility and business value

The battle over the most downloaded woman on the Internet has got hotter with American slapper Danni Ashe declaring her claim to the throne and dissing other international wannabes. Danni takes this very seriously as you can see from her Web site which lists how many times more downloaded she is over every other woman in the world.

Cindy Margolis? Pah! Our Danni is 15 times more "bigger" than her, according to danni.com (we've seen the pictures and reckon 1.6 tops). Britney Spears? Better, but no cookie. Danni is 2.9 times more a woman than she is. Bizarrely Oprah Winfrey is closer with 2.7 times. But the nearest is Carol Cox at just 1.5 times smaller (who the hell is Carol Cox? A "famous Internet amateur/swinger who has been online since 1995").

So what sparked this controversy and caused even BusinessWire to write a piece about her? The upshot Australians with their Sarah Jane and us in Blighty with the far superior Nora Batty (aka actress Kathy Staff).

The Aussies has been making a hullabaloo about how Sarah Jane will break the Guinness Book of Records on 1 August by being the most downloaded woman in a day (70,000 downloads they're after, and they promise some saucy snaps to entice you).

Danni don't like this, so she's gone to the press saying: "There's been a great deal of misinformation and confusion I'd like to clear up for everyone's benefit [whose benefit exactly?]. Guinness World Records is currently refusing to award new 'download' titles due to their self-confessed inability to measure Web site statistics. I've put them in touch with three highly respected independent third parties, but they don't seem ready to move forward in this area."

Apart form being a bit of a loon, Danni has a certain kind of dirty appeal that can always guarantee a wide audience. She's certainly not shy. Sarah Jane on the other hand goes for the more refined sauce element of society. And as for Nora Batty, well, she stands miles apart from the competition through her realistic and unconquerable womanhood.

Danni has every right to be worried. Especially if Nora runs into her.

If you want to see Danni's obsessive protectionism go here. ®

Related Story

Fellow Brits unite! As one behind Nora Batty

Next gen security for virtualised datacentres

More from The Register

next story
6 Obvious Reasons Why Facebook Will Ban This Article (Thank God)
Clampdown on clickbait ... and El Reg is OK with this
No, thank you. I will not code for the Caliphate
Some assignments, even the Bongster decline must
Fast And Furious 6 cammer thrown in slammer for nearly three years
Man jailed for dodgy cinema recording of Hollywood movie
Caught red-handed: UK cops, PCSOs, specials behaving badly… on social media
No Mr Fuzz, don't ask a crime victim to be your pal on Facebook
Barnes & Noble: Swallow a Samsung Nook tablet, please ... pretty please
Novelslab finally on sale with ($199 - $20) price tag
Ballmer leaves Microsoft board to spend more time with his b-balls
From Clippy to Clippers: Hi, I see you're running an NBA team now ...
Video of US journalist 'beheading' pulled from social media
Yanked footage featured British-accented attacker and US journo James Foley
Assange™: Hey world, I'M STILL HERE, ignore that Snowden guy
Press conference: ME ME ME ME ME ME ME (cont'd pg 94)
Call of Duty daddy considers launching own movie studio
Activision Blizzard might like quality control of a CoD film
prev story

Whitepapers

Implementing global e-invoicing with guaranteed legal certainty
Explaining the role local tax compliance plays in successful supply chain management and e-business and how leading global brands are addressing this.
5 things you didn’t know about cloud backup
IT departments are embracing cloud backup, but there’s a lot you need to know before choosing a service provider. Learn all the critical things you need to know.
Why and how to choose the right cloud vendor
The benefits of cloud-based storage in your processes. Eliminate onsite, disk-based backup and archiving in favor of cloud-based data protection.
Top 8 considerations to enable and simplify mobility
In this whitepaper learn how to successfully add mobile capabilities simply and cost effectively.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?