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Could you lend us a tenner til payday?

We know that Vulture Central is not among the industry's big hitters when it comes to salaries, but little did we realise how bad things had become for young Kieren McCarthy.

In a desperate bid to balance the books, the poor boy has been moonlighting as an Alliance Party of Northern Ireland member of the Northern Ireland Assembly.

He obviously thought that a slight change of name - from Kieren to Kieran - would confound any investigation. Not so.

When Reg investigators first uncovered the truth, management refused to believe that when Kieren had been 'working from home', and 'on his mobile', he had in fact been making a vital contribution to the Irish peace process. However, a quick look at Alderman McCarthy's credentials - including photo (above), confirmed the worst.

Vulture Central staff are currently having a whip-round and searching down the back of the sofa for loose change in a bid to alleviate the lad's fiscal misery. ®

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