Lego porn! Hot and plasticky

Furniture porn has competition

By Kieren McCarthy • Get more from this author

Posted in Media, 27th April 2001 17:14 GMT

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While you can get sacked for looking at, saving or Photoshopping your work colleague's head onto some filthy porn, the Internet has provided us with a clean, safe, legal way of focussing those lustful intentions.

In this field of comedy porn, the crown is undoubtedly held by FurniturePorn.com. There was a brief tussle for the top spot last year when Barbie tied herself to a miniature bed and had a friend attempt the impossible but it didn't beat the sight of two deckchairs going at it like wild dogs.

But now we have Lego Porn. That's, those loveable dumpy yellow plastic folk have gone adult. The scenarios are incredible and every manner of filth including sadistic violence and arsonic murder are covered by the tots. The incredible customisation of the Lego figures - paint a crop top on that flat body and you suddenly have a prostitute - also allow for exotic storylines.

Enough, you say. My mouse hand is getting sweaty for clicks. Well, here you go then. Enjoy.