Feeds

MS using the old Blue Screen to sell Win2k

'Get rid of that crap OS we sold you'

  • alert
  • submit to reddit

Choosing a cloud hosting partner with confidence

A two-page Microsoft ad in the 6 February issue of PC Magazine proudly features the classic Win9x & NT blue screen of death bordered by a dotted line and scissors icon, next to a boxed suggestion that one should cut the familiar screen out and save it for old times' sake after upgrading to Win2k Pro.

"If you find yourself missing the downtime, cut out and tape to monitor," the adjacent boxed text recommends.

Towards the bottom of the page we find the cheerful slogan, "Goodbye blue screen; hello reliable Microsoft." ('At last,' we're tempted to add.)

Windows 2000 Professional is "thirteen times more reliable than Windows 98", the advert proudly boasts, and directs readers to the NSTL Web site where independent test results supporting this claim may be evaluated.

Sure enough, mean time to failure (MTTF) tests for 98, NT and 2k show, among other things, that the heavily-sold consumer OS is hopelessly buggy and in fact eager to crash.

2K wins the competition hands down with a respectable MTTF of 2893 hours (actually sounds like a professional product, doesn't it). NT showed considerable anaemia, struggling for an MTTF of 919 hours, while the crap OS most of you are using as you read this article, Win9x, exhibited a predictable, consumer-schlock MTTF of only 216 hours.

Microsoft reckons you'd better get rid of those nasty NT and '9x desktops fast. A Win2k Pro upgrade is their solution for disgusted NT users, and can be had for less than $200 per machine. Unlucky '9x users will have to wait for the consumer edition of this nifty, and finally reliable, OS - called Whistler - which is due out towards the end of this year.

Unfortunately for Harry Homeowner, but fortunately for MS, nothing can be done with '9x to make it reliable in the mean time, so he simply has to buy Whistler if he wishes to experience the joys of a (finally) "reliable Microsoft".

The '9x code base was crap to begin with, and crap it remains. But no one can accuse us of MS-bashing here; the company's own ad campaign makes precisely that assertion.

And offers the test results to prove it, too. ®

Related Story

MS: 'you need to buy Whistler because Win9x sucks'

Top 5 reasons to deploy VMware with Tegile

More from The Register

next story
That dreaded syncing feeling: Will Microsoft EVER fix OneDrive?
Microsoft's long history of broken Windows sync
Mozilla, EFF, Cisco back free-as-in-FREE-BEER SSL cert authority
Let’s Encrypt to give HTTPS-everywhere a boost in 2015
SLURP! Flick your TONGUE around our LOLLIPOP – Google
Android 5 is coming – IF you're lucky enough to have the right gadget
Nokia's N1 fondleslab's HIDDEN BRILLIANCE: The 'Z Launcher'
Sugarcoating Android's Lollipop makes tab easier to swallow
Bug fixes! Get your APPLE BUG FIXES! iOS and OS X updates right here!
Yosemite fixes Wi-Fi hiccup, older iOS devices get performance boost
Facebook, working on Facebook at Work, works on Facebook. At Work
You don't want your cat or drunk pics at the office
Soz, web devs: Google snatches its Wallet off the table
Killing off web service in 3 months... but app-happy bonkers are fine
Meet Windows 10's new UI for OneDrive – also known as File Explorer
New preview build continues Redmond's retreat to the desktop
Microsoft: Your Linux Docker containers are now OURS to command
New tool lets admins wrangle Linux apps from Windows
prev story

Whitepapers

Choosing cloud Backup services
Demystify how you can address your data protection needs in your small- to medium-sized business and select the best online backup service to meet your needs.
Getting started with customer-focused identity management
Learn why identity is a fundamental requirement to digital growth, and how without it there is no way to identify and engage customers in a meaningful way.
Reg Reader Research: SaaS based Email and Office Productivity Tools
Read this Reg reader report which provides advice and guidance for SMBs towards the use of SaaS based email and Office productivity tools.
Simplify SSL certificate management across the enterprise
Simple steps to take control of SSL across the enterprise, and recommendations for a management platform for full visibility and single-point of control for these Certificates.
Saudi Petroleum chooses Tegile storage solution
A storage solution that addresses company growth and performance for business-critical applications of caseware archive and search along with other key operational systems.