Feeds

The clog poppin' Darwin awards for 2000

The stupid people, and how they die

  • alert
  • submit to reddit

Top 5 reasons to deploy VMware with Tegile

New Year tends to be a time of reflection, a time when we look back over the past year and take stock. So what better time to announce the list of people who have contributed most to humanity by removing themselves from the gene pool in the most innovative ways. Yes, it is time for the Darwin Awards.

This year among the winners we have the tragic case of a man who fell into his own wood chipper. He was trying to clear a jam, but failed to switch the power off before doing so. Or the very security conscious fellow who wired his garden fence with household current, only to electrocute himself as he reached for a ripe tomato. Surely a clear illustration of the dangers of DIY.

More dangerous even that DIY, of course, is drug use. Or at least in can be if a little intelligence is not applied to the situation. Having smoked a few joints, a couple fell asleep on the roof of the King Charles Inn in North Carolina. In his drug induced snooze-fest the man did not notice as his other half slid off the roof to her death, also apparently oblivious to her fate.

The trump card in the pack and more proof that drugs-will-kill-you is the case of the Human Popsicle. An Ohio truck driver was reported as "missing in action" by his employers. The police found his frozen body, head down among the broccoli pallets in the back of his truck. He has apparently slipped while reaching for a stash of cocaine.

There were obviously a large number of stupid deaths in 2000 since the Darwin Awards panel is still deliberating on the honourable mentions list, which will be out in late January.

Meanwhile, more Darwin Award nominees and recipients can be found at the Darwin Awards homepage. ®

Secure remote control for conventional and virtual desktops

More from The Register

next story
Win a year’s supply of chocolate (no tech knowledge required)
Over £200 worth of the good stuff up for grabs
Facebook's Zuckerberg in EBOLA VIRUS FIGHT: Billionaire battles bug
US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention contacted as site supremo coughs up
Space exploration is just so lame. NEW APPS are mankind's future
We feel obliged to point out the headline statement is total, utter cobblers
Red Bull does NOT give you wings, $13.5m lawsuit says so
Website letting consumers claim $10 cash back crashes after stampede
Down-under record: Australian gets $140k for pussy
'Tiffany' closes deal - 'it's more common to offer your wife', says agent
Internet finally ready to replace answering machine cassette tape
It's a simple message and I'm leaving out the whistles and bells
Swiss wildlife park serves up furry residents to visitors
'It's ecological' says spokesman, now how would you like your Bambi done?
The iPAD launch BEFORE it happened: SPECULATIVE GUFF ahead of actual event
Nerve-shattering run-up to the pre-planned known event
STONER SHEEP get the MUNCHIES after feasting on £4k worth of cannabis plants
Baaaaaa! Fanny's Farm's woolly flock is high, maaaaaan
prev story

Whitepapers

Forging a new future with identity relationship management
Learn about ForgeRock's next generation IRM platform and how it is designed to empower CEOS's and enterprises to engage with consumers.
Why cloud backup?
Combining the latest advancements in disk-based backup with secure, integrated, cloud technologies offer organizations fast and assured recovery of their critical enterprise data.
Win a year’s supply of chocolate
There is no techie angle to this competition so we're not going to pretend there is, but everyone loves chocolate so who cares.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?
Intelligent flash storage arrays
Tegile Intelligent Storage Arrays with IntelliFlash helps IT boost storage utilization and effciency while delivering unmatched storage savings and performance.