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Guns disguised as mobile phones

I've got one. And the next fucker who starts yapping on his or her phone on the Waterloo to Brookwood train is going to bleed.

Cheers,
Spokey



ShittyGift.com points to online crap merchants

Sounds a bit like the idea dreamed up by Reginald Perrin in the old series "The Fall and Rise of Reginald Perrin".

He started up a chain of shops called 'Grot' where you could go to buy presents for people you didn't like. The only gifts I can remember at this instant were a tennis racket without any strings, and square hulahoops.

Mark Gillman



Police request right to spy on every UK phone call and email

This kind of crap could not happen until the British people were disarmed by their government. Now, the people have no recourse against the government and the government knows it! Big Brother is definitely watching you!

Sigh! You Brits ignored history (see Adolph Hitler/Nazi party growth history) and you are doomed to repeat it!

A gun-toting, informed (not brain-washed) USA citizen,

Tom Griffis



Was the Internet based on alien technology?

Re: "and how come aliens always know it's best to observe humankind in the US? They probably know Hollywood is based there."

The little green men in the back of the cave say it's because we advertise, reservations were easier and parking was a snap...

Hermit



AMD 760 needs mobo redesign

Mr. Thomas,

In regards to your excellent juh-juh-juh-journalism on the AMD 760 chipset redesign; I would like to comment that a more effective way of achieving your goal of Intel world domination might be to post good news about AMD, which more often than not will cause the company's stock to tank mercilessly.

Yours
The Anti-Thomas



[Sent to Mad Mike Magee upon his return from India]



So you're back? Want to know what happened when you were away? Well, Intel finally threw in the towel and reverted back to making chips for traffic lights, Craig Barrett was reported to of said "That Magee guy, I just can't take it anymore, his stories always leave me in tears, I give up" with a tear in his eye, another journalist overheard Craig whispering to Paul Otellini ... "what happened to Magee, did our boys finally sort him out, or has Rambus captured him?". Indecently, a court finally upheld Rambus's "oxygen" patent, you're now required to pay royalties on respiration because the processes are propitiatory.

AMD (aka. the All Mighty Dominion) now rules the roost but they're trying to force a new type of memory on us called DAMBUS.. it doesn't work and is grossly inflated in price, that's if you can find any, but we have no choice these days, Intel are no good unless you want your computer to turn either red, amber or green.

A re-evaluation of the dotcoms occurred a few weeks ago and many were revived back from the dead in a burst of enthusiasm, 99% of all dotcoms are now profitable. On a ironic note, fuckedcompany.com has gone bankrupt. Slashdot has turned into an online hardware bazar for VA Linux, you're still allowed to post comments but you must include the word "VA Linux is the best" in at least every sentence. Kuro5hin.org has been inundated with a new batch of posters always referring to 'hot grits'.

As for the Register... you need to put all the other journalists back in the place, i.e. forbid them from writing about (defunked) Intel ever again.

Andrew



Palestinian crackers give out tools to attack Israelis

I just felt I had to say something about certain bits of misinformation which gets repeatedly printed in coverage of this silly Israeli-Palestinian "cyber-war".

I have some background in computer security, and in the last few years have served in the Israeli's army in the Army Intelligence corps in a computers related job.

First, on something you said in the current article, I find it very hard (Although I don't know for certain, which makes me feel free to talk about it) to believe that the Mossad would go around recruiting civilian security experts to handle with the crisis. First, we/they already have some people in charge of dealing with these kinds of problems. Not many, and not all of them know what does computer security mean (another story which I have no intention of getting into), but there are. Second, it's a bureaucratic organization. If they believed the fate of the country to depend on it then maybe they'll be able to do something like this fast, but just maybe. And Third, it isn't a crisis. There's nothing really important that's online. Actual military and government networks are mostly not connected to the Internet. And whatever few connections exist to low-importance networks are usually pretty closely monitored. Nobody in the Mossad would quickly make huge efforts to prevent random knocking-down and defacements of commercial Web sites that didn't apply their security patches. It's not their job. And there's not much they can do anyway.

And it they did, they would certainly not approach the one's who's the topic I wanted to talk about. The much mentioned Mr. Tenenbaum, aka "Analyzer". Everybody agrees that the Pentagon hack wasn't very hard or difficult. It was made utilizing a known and old security hole. Anybody with no more knowledge then how to run something sent to him by a friend could have done it. Did it. I wouldn't go as far to say he's a complete idiot, but that's just because I'm a polite person and don't know him personally. I do know that the time following the incident me and several security-literate people I know had to suffer utterances like "Say, you know computer hacking, right? Like the Analyzer?"... Some were nice and explained to those people asking that no, they know more about hacking than their dogs. Some were not so polite. I do hang around in good company, so no cases of actual physical violence.

He's no mastermind, no super-hacker, and no security wizard. He's just a jerk with great PR. And I'm starting to get sick and tired of seeing him hailed again and again as if he is. Even if he is better than what I think, he's certainly far below what all this coverage suggests.

[name removed to get you paranoid]

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