Feeds

Microsoft urges people not to use the Internet

You are at great risk, says the Beast of Redmond

  • alert
  • submit to reddit

Beginner's guide to SSL certificates

Updated Finding out what exactly Microsoft is thinking is harder than getting blood out of a stone or a coherent sentence out your grandma, but work hard enough...

The Beast of Redmond has put an online form on its Web site that will tell you what sort of risk you are running of having obtained unlicensed or pirated software. Which is nice. Depending on how you answer, M$ will give you a low, medium or high-risk rating. So we had a play around to determine exactly what Microsoft saw as risky behaviour.

Unsurprisingly, if you buy all your software off Microsoft, have all the licences at hand and also purchase upgrade licences, client access licences and purchasing licences, then you are at low-risk. Deviate much from this and you enter medium risk.

Your software is pre-installed (keeping all the other answers the same)? Medium risk. Your IT department installed it? Medium risk. You're not sure that you have licences for every piece of software? High risk straight away. You don't know exactly how many workstations your company has? From Low to High risk in one fell swoop.

However, of most interest to us were the Internet options. It would seem that Microsoft - despite everything it says - doesn't trust the Internet at all. In answer to the question "How did you acquire the software installed on your workstations/servers?", three of the ten options concern the Net. These are: Internet acquisition - On-line Store, On-line Auction and Downloaded from Internet.

Select any of these three and you are immediately sent from a Low risk situation to a High risk one. So there you have it - Microsoft doesn't want you to use the Internet. We'd always suspected.

Update

Incidentally, don't bother to try the quiz out if you are using anything but Internet Explorer. Such is the complexity of running a simple quiz that only a product as amazing as Explorer can deal with it. Good to see Microsoft hasn't changed. ®

Related Link

MS' online form (try it yourself - you'll be Medium risk)

Choosing a cloud hosting partner with confidence

More from The Register

next story
Phones 4u slips into administration after EE cuts ties with Brit mobe retailer
More than 5,500 jobs could be axed if rescue mission fails
Driving with an Apple Watch could land you with a £100 FINE
Bad news for tech-addicted fanbois behind the wheel
Special pleading against mass surveillance won't help anyone
Protecting journalists alone won't protect their sources
Phones 4u website DIES as wounded mobe retailer struggles to stay above water
Founder blames 'ruthless network partners' for implosion
Radio hams can encrypt, in emergencies, says Ofcom
Consultation promises new spectrum and hints at relaxed licence conditions
Big Content Australia just blew a big hole in its credibility
AHEDA's research on average content prices did not expose methodology, so appears less than rigourous
Vodafone to buy 140 Phones 4u stores from stricken retailer
887 jobs 'preserved' in the process, says administrator PwC
prev story

Whitepapers

Secure remote control for conventional and virtual desktops
Balancing user privacy and privileged access, in accordance with compliance frameworks and legislation. Evaluating any potential remote control choice.
Intelligent flash storage arrays
Tegile Intelligent Storage Arrays with IntelliFlash helps IT boost storage utilization and effciency while delivering unmatched storage savings and performance.
WIN a very cool portable ZX Spectrum
Win a one-off portable Spectrum built by legendary hardware hacker Ben Heck
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?
Beginner's guide to SSL certificates
De-mystify the technology involved and give you the information you need to make the best decision when considering your online security options.