Competition The Winner of the bullet riddled mobo
You knew we'd get round to it eventually...
The Register ran a competition for a reader to win the mobo which Kay Buena shot to pieces.
We are pleased to announce that Julian. J. Jones has won. His entry read:
I deserve to win Kay Buena's motherboard because... no one else does.
Let me qualify that statement by explaining that only child or a moron would actually want a damaged mother board, hence all other people who enter this competition are clearly deranged or pointless individuals who do not deserve to win any prize under any conditions. I on the other hand have fully recognise the futility and stupidity of such a competition and have clearly shown a moral and psychological superiority over all other entrants.
Oh and also I have a great plan to fashion it in to a hat, then wear it while I run around outside during thunder storms in the hopes of being struck by lightning. The result of which will fuse the hardware in to my skull, augmenting my aforementioned intellectual superiority with digital technology I shall become more powerful then you can possibly imagine.
So send it to me or deny the world the wondrous power of my computer brain!!
Now, we need to explain that the first paragraph in which Julian extols his own virtues was not the clincher. No, in fact it was his proposed cybernetics experiment and the promise of photographic evidence of the hat, once constructed, which won us over.
In fact, Julian has even promised to alter his Last Will and Testament, allowing us first dibs on his charred corpse should his encounter with a lightning bolt prove fatal.
Good for you Julian. The motherboard is all yours.
Honourable mentions will get a T-shirt.
As for the funeral song, there was only one possibility: Dan Edwards, who suggested Rage against the Machines's "Killing in the name of..."
Congratulations to our winners, and thanks for all the entries. ®