The Register discovers Jesus
We seek redemption... and find it
Repentance has arrived in the form of AskJesus.org. Through the power of the Lord, AskJesus (which is 'not endorsed or sponsored by or otherwise affiliated with Ask Jeeves' but does bear a canny resemblance to it) converts our black words of hatred into God-approved revelations.
As if that weren't enough, heart-warming images of Christ, pulsating and informing us of his intention to rise, are included amidst our dread-ridden stories.
In this confused, materialistic world, where human analysts are currently poring over Microsoft's possible future, AskJesus reliably informs us that nobody but Jesus knows the outcome and only an immaculately conceived administration will sort out the problems. Thank Christ for that. ®
Click here to see the light.