The Register® — Biting the hand that feeds IT

The Beast whinges

Sniff...

Free whitepaper – Power distribution systems for the Dell PowerEdge M1000e Modular Server Enclosure

MS on Trial When Judge Thomas Penfield Jackson returned from lunch on Wednesday, he blew Microsoft's mind. The Beast had been busy arguing that it needed a good six months more to mount a proper, lingering defence.

"This case has been pending for two years," a florid Jackson shot back. Then he ordered the US Department of Justice (DoJ) to run up a plan to break the beast into three pieces, separating operating system, applications, and Internet concerns including browser, portal and ISP. He said he wanted it fast, by the end of the week, and gave the company a mere 48 hours to reply.

The most important company in human history had been denied due process, Microsoft lawyers cried.

It was a sunny afternoon in Washington as the flacks gathered on the courthouse steps, eager to spin the day's events.

"It was incumbent upon us to inform the court, and the record, that there was a good deal of evidence that we thought was pertinent to the subject of appropriate relief, and to make that a part of the record," Microsoft General Counsel and silver-tongued-devil William Neukom sniffed at a press conference outside the courthouse.

The vultures circled with delight. "Not only will the world not end if there is a break-up of Microsoft, but it will be a much better world for the industry, for consumers and for innovation," Computer and Communications Industry Association spokesman Ed Black commented.

The CCIA assisted in drafting the brief of Amici Curiae which originally suggested to Judge Jackson the undeniable charm of a three-way break-up.

DoJ lawyer David Boies said the Department would have the requested paperwork in Jackson's hands by Friday. He seemed not at all distressed, suggesting that the DoJ might just have seen fit to get such a document ready in draft form, set to go after a bit of buffing. He would not confirm that such a document exists, but we have our suspicions.

One can only hope that the other side condescended to read the enemy Amicus brief, and that it saw fit to anticipate it with a bit of legalistic boilerplate which they can now buff up and submit. Otherwise, the lights are going to be on very late in Redmond. Very late indeed. ®

Free whitepaper – SPECjbb2005 performance and power consumption on Dell, HP, and IBM blade servers

Don’t Miss

DustbinDirty, dirty PCs: The X-rated picture guide

Ventblockers Horror beyond human imagination

SC09Top 500 supers - rise of the Linux quad-cores

SC09 Jaguar munches Roadrunner

Ubuntu teaser Early adopters bloodied by Ubuntu's Karmic Koala

Smooth Windows upgrade it ain't

Sign up, sign up for The Register IT security newsletter

Narrowcasting for the email classes