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Reg names IT CEO of the Millennium

This was a tough one...

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Internet Security Threat Report 2014

Faced with the tremendous task of winnowing the chaff from the wheat, seven Register judges were, once more, forced to convene in a hostelry to determine just which IT CEO would receive our once-in-a-lifetime award. Bill Gates was disqualified from the competition because we did not receive his application on time. Lou "Boot" Gerstner, was also disqualified because of his hasty nature. Winsome Carly Fiorina, now CEO of HP, was also disqualified but for technical reasons. The judges noted that she was formerly CEO of Lucent, and said that its logo was too distasteful to even think about. Scott McNealy of Sun received a couple of votes from the judges but the majority feeling was that as he was likely to win a similar award from the dental profession, it would be unfair to swell his ego further. Similar considerations were made in the cases of Oracle's Larry Ellison and Apple's Steve Jobs. William Jeremiah Sanders III, CEO of AMD, received a special commendation for services to KFC, but the judges felt that Intel's CEO, Craig Barrett, spent too much time moonlighting from his job to be seriously considered. They noted that running a multi-billion corporation was a full-time profession, and selling designer log cabins in his spare time had had a detrimental effect on Intel's ability to execute. If Eckhard Pfeiffer had just hung in there at Q until the end of the year, he would have had a good chance of winning the award. In fact, after several hours in the hostelry, the judges came up with a surprise winner. Carlo de Benedetti, ex-CEO of Olivetti, wins the award for his remarkable accomplishments. Not only did he preside over some bad times for the company while he was in the job, but he has the unique distinction of being the only CEO among the contenders to be a convicted fraudster. And, as far as the judges are aware, he has not spent a single night of his prison sentence in the clink. Congratulations to Carlo, who wins an all-expenses paid trip to Pentonville Prison. ® The Register's IT Company of the Millennium Award

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