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Compaq readies users for the nuthouse

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Internet Security Threat Report 2014

An otherwise dismal and bleak presentation of Microsoft's Pocket PC - which it appears to believe is the answer to the Palm - was lightened by three incidents at Leicester Square club Home last night. Several key IT hacks, including venerable and venerated fellows from PC Magazine UK, were shunted into a dark alcove where they were treated to a presentation on a broken wide screen while simultaneously being frozen by rather high powered air conditioning. A lass from the BBC got so bored with the endless presentations that she called her mate on the other side of the vast acreage and started chatting and waving to her simultaneously. And then Compaq's presentation of its device started. This comes in three flavours, all described as "jackets", but the best jacket is the vanilla flavoured one called, believe it or not, the Straight Jacket. So when you walk into your local retailer, just make sure that you're talking into your handfree mobile phone as you ask the representative: "Could I have a straitjacket please?". ®

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