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Gateway cow maddens mothers

Rubber promo toy labelled hazard to children

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Internet Security Threat Report 2014

PC vendor Gateway was struck with its own form of Mad Cow Disease this weekend when it emerged the company's latest bovine-based promotional product, the so-called "Rubber Stress Cow", could prove harmful to children. Apparently, the foam rubber toy can easily be mutilated UFO-style by unsuspecting sproggs who could then choke on the dismembered remains. Whether this will subsequently induce bovine spongiform encelopathy in the wee ones remains to be seen. However, it's clear the spongy stress reliever isn't quite as safe as it might seem. According to Gateway, the toy is "designed to let you squeeze tension [presumably induced when your new PC fails to work properly] away". However, overly tense Gateway users will now have to seek other outlets for their anger -- the company said it is recalling all of the one million or so toys it has handed out. ®

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