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The Register has been overwhelmed by the number of emails its has received quoting some of the best email signatures around. Here's our top ten -- as sent in by you, our readers -- and in no particular order. 1) No matter how hard you try, you can't polish crap! Steve Lindsey 2) Failure is not an option -- it comes bundled with Windows. Perry Newhook 3) A bunch of flowers is like a bunch of arse - only it smells sweeter..." Fine Slagmen 4) Wise Chinese Proverb: "Fed up of your computer winning at chess? Try it at kick-boxing instead!" Patrick Kirk 5) Alligator circumcision by appointment only. (spotted in an email signature from a vet in Michigan) Martin A. Zaluski 6) Show me a man who has both feet on the ground, and I'll show you a man who can't put on his trousers. Elfed Lewis 7) Support bacteria. It's the only culture some people have. Lloyd Evoy 8) VMS is today what Microsoft wants Windows NT V8.0 to be!" Compaq, 22-Sep-1998 Steve Lindsey 9) Your mouse has moved. Windows must be restarted for the change to take effect. Reboot now? [OK] Steve Lindsey 10) The box said, "Requires Windows 95 or Better", so I bought a Mac. Steve Lindsey ®

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